(bride.)

go on over!

2008-12-18T00:10:00.001-05:00

I posted at the new blog - please check it out!

more recap right here...

slinking back...

2008-12-15T21:47:00.002-05:00

My profound apologies to the few of you who have been anxiously awaiting wedding recaps, as well as the others who have just wondered "where the hell is she?" Well, the honest truth is that I'm so sick of weddings that I can't handle blogging about mine.

It's not like I'm violently tearing wedding dresses off mannequins at David's Bridal, although I admit I received my MOH dress (not from DB but from Dessy via the amazing netbride.com) for my best friend's wedding and haven't tried it on yet. I haven't even gotten to the point of unsubscribing from all the wedding blogs that provided so much inspiration for my own wedding, though I do simply delete almost every post from my Google Reader every day rather than pore over all of them. It's just that I haven't had any desire to do my own recaps here, or for the blog that might post a little feature on my DIY and earth-friendly projects. My dress is still hanging in our garage/basement. I haven't attempted to sell any of the tchotchkes I so lovingly created and collected. Some gifts are even sitting unopened because I know what's in the boxes and don't want to deal with putting them away (ungrateful wretch). And I certainly haven't gotten close to finishing thank-you notes.

Tim and I are going to Milwaukee in a couple weeks (Dec. 28) for a post-wedding celebration with many of my family's friends who weren't able to attend the wedding. I think it'll be a nice way to end the whole shebang. But for now, dear readers, I'm going to officially end this blog, rather than drag it out even longer. A picture-heavy and text-light wedding recap will soon be here. I hope you'll join me.

Wendy

wedding recap #1: pre-ceremony

2008-11-11T19:48:00.011-05:00

After 2 weeks of the flu (+ ear infection, + sinus infection) and generally loving life ;-), I'm back and ready to show you pictures! Sorry that some of them have the watermark of our fabulous photographer, and also that many are unedited - Laura gave me a bunch of them without the watermark and with more vibrant colors, but then I couldn't help adding more. :-)

One more time: I love Laura and Peter. Love them.

Here we go!

The banquet room, pre-ceremony: you can see the tent through the doorway, where the chuppah is set up and waiting for us.

Honestly, I have no idea how this all got done so beautifully. Well, no, that's not fair at all - Tim, my mom, the Fontainebleau staff, the caterers, and the wedding party were working incredibly hard for hours making everything look beautiful. But I saw very little of that! I was feeling so sick the couple days before the wedding and the day of the wedding that all my list-making aspirations went out the window, and that morning I just haphazardly assigned tasks to the wedding party and was totally spaced out. But they outdid themselves. The guys were given the task of hanging the paper lanterns (in addition to setting up all the throwies Tim and I had made), and I'm fairly certain they spent an hour just figuring out an algorithm that would make them look best. Yes, our friends are nerds.

Here I am with Ariel, who's wearing the crown I made to match our ribbon ties... I did the ribbon part, and Audrey (flower lady extraordinaire) made a gorgeous wreath-type thing that fit perfectly onto the ribbon crown.

My fam - grandpa, mom, (me,) dad, aunt Merle (affectionately known as Auntie M)

Pop quiz: guess how old my grandpa is. No fair if you already know. Answer will be in my next post.

My husband, looking so happy - yay! The guys had forgotten to put on their boutonnieres. They did it a few minutes later.

Our "first look," very representative of us: silly.

Look at those trees in the background! I was so sad for a month before the wedding when I saw fallen leaves, because I was worried everything would be dead for the wedding. Such an optimist. :-)

I love that Peter caught this shot. Are dragonflies good luck, like bird crap? I'd rather have a dragonfly, thankyouverymuch.

Chrissy, Melissa, me, Gabby, Hillary - they're wearing their gorgeous shawls by Jes. I opted not to wear the beautiful jacket she made for me, because I was apparently sweating out a fever. Our bouquets are decorated with the ribbon ties I made!

The guys ran down the hill to the lake and dock, and somewhere in the process Tim lost his boutonniere. But it sure is a great picture.

At this point, I've handed my bouquet to Tim so I can go find straight pins to fashion a makeshift bout. But Hillary's dad, Terry, managed to find the original!

On the table is our ketubah by our friend Paul. It is SO awesome. The painting was done on a reclaimed wood tabletop, and the wood things on the side (when hanging, they're on the right) are sliders for the English and Hebrew texts of the ketubah to fit into. Our rabbi (the wonderful David Regenspan) is holding one of the texts.

It was a little weird to be in that room because it was right by the front door, and guests kept walking in as we were trying to do something very serious - signing the ketubah and marriage license. I just felt a little bad that people kept ducking their heads in to say hi, and we had specifically asked my grandpa and aunt to be our witnesses... I envisioned it being a private event. It was still really nice, but it felt really chaotic with lots of people trying to talk to us. Then after we finished (with 5 minutes to spare before the ceremony), Tim noticed some friends come in with their uninvited teenage son. It wasn't exactly what I wanted to hit me right before the ceremony, but oh well.

Our friends Molly and Michael are serving themselves some hopefully-hotter-now-than-when-I-tried-it cider before the ceremony. Luckily, when Tim and I went upstairs for Yichud, it was plenty hot and we sat soothing our throats with hot cider. :-) Awww, how romantic!

I'm so excited to share more with you! What next - details or ceremony?

All pictures by Laura Kozlowski and Peter Ozolins, c. 2008 Laura B. Kozlowski.

New family member!!!

2008-11-02T13:31:00.005-05:00

This is my beautiful new niece, No-Name. Her name has its roots in ancient Jewish traditions. Har har. Actually, she'll be officially named and blessed at my brother and SIL's synagogue tomorrow morning. ***Update: Her name is Sara Tikvah - Sara pronounced "Sahhhra" (the Hebrew way), and Tikvah meaning "hope." They plan to call her by her full name. I love it!

Pretty good reason for Josh & Hillary not being able to come to the wedding, eh?

There is very little doubt as to whose family she's part of:

hair
cheeks
size! (21 inches; 8 lbs, 15.5 oz)

leave me unprotected, please.

2008-10-31T14:18:00.002-04:00

Copy this sentence into your blog if you're in a heterosexual marriage, and you don't want it "protected" by people who think GLBT marriage hurts it somehow.

(Thanks, Stinkerpants!)

www.noon8.org

Don't know where to vote?

first teaser (b&w)

2008-10-28T11:38:00.006-04:00

First, I must say again that I am so in love with our photographer and her assistant (& boyfriend), Laura Kozlowski and Peter Ozolins. They had the perfect temperament for us - very chill, definitely not hyper, but still great about getting people revved up for a good photo and about sticking to a schedule - and they take beautiful photos. They're the same two who took our awesome engagement photos.

Despite some holdups that made them get to the Inn at the requested time but not come upstairs to do the end-of-getting-ready pics I had asked for, they stayed beyond the contracted amount of time, partied with us a little bit, and seemed to genuinely get along with our friends, which is pretty awesome.

So here's the first teaser Laura sent me this morning. It's b&w, so you can't see my dress yet in its full splendor, but I love the vintage-y look of the shot. I also love the slightly suspicious expressions on our faces... you can tell that we're both a little uncomfortable, and I think that's good. It's the real deal.

source

that's it!

2008-10-27T19:46:00.005-04:00

DESPITE both of us having horrible colds; our cat giving my a four-inch long set of bloody scratches on my upper chest, right on the skin exposed by my V-neck dress; a somewhat overzealous/overexcited flower girl telling the photographers I was having a "moment" (with a motion toward her head) and that they couldn't go upstairs to take getting-ready pictures (resulting in their sitting around for ~45 minutes when the bridesmaids and I were getting ready sans photos, and all other pre-ceremony activities getting pushed back enough that it felt more stressful than it would have otherwise); and two friends/colleagues showing up with their not-invited 13-year-old-son...

...it was amazing.

Certainly didn't start that way, I must say. I really don't want to be that person telling you about how it started SO bad and ended SO great, because it really didn't start THAT bad. It was just kind of waking up on the wrong side of the bed, which is a wedding-day bummer, I'd venture to say. I woke up yesterday feeling absolutely horrendous, which made me really sad... definitely not that first-day-of-school feeling (yes, I'm a nerd). Our rehearsal dinner and welcome party were a lot of fun, but I was already feeling pretty sick and wasn't feeling much like socializing. My outfit was a hit, though! :-) The food at Maxie's was SO great (fried green tomatoes!!!), and Tim had the brilliant idea of using some of my painstakingly decorated jelly jars as decoration there, since there weren't centerpieces. (They have awesome lamps and ceiling decorations, and the food was family-style so big centerpieces would've been annoying.) It was wonderful and made for really nice ambiance.

At home, we had WAY too much food and drink, but oh well! now we have leftovers. Our next-door neighbors, whom we don't know very well but whom we had had apprised of the party a few days earlier (and I got to hold Sydney, their 3-month-old kitten!!), brought over an absolutely incredible cake she made for us. It was a HUGE round chocolate cake with a kind of cream cheese frosting, with piped words like "love," "forgiveness," and "understanding" (and more creative ones I can't think of right now) on the side. It was such a beautiful gesture that really meant a lot to us, especially because we haven't talked to them a whole lot... it feels like a fresh start. :-) (Not that we had any bad blood, but they're just really shy, and so is Tim, and... I'm just out of town all the time. :-P )

So anyway, my mom did a great job of shooing people out, even though Tim didn't totally understand why people had to leave. (Boys.) Two of his groomsmen stayed and drank scotch until about 1, which was totally fine... I went to sleep and couldn't hear them at all.

But in the morning, I felt like such absolute shit that I didn't know how I was going to get through the day. I woke up around 9 and started getting ready (whaaaaa? 9?! a bride?!? waking up at NINE on her wedding day?!?!?!), but Tim was still sleeping. We needed to leave at 10:15 to get to the Inn in time to meet the wedding party. Needless to say, with him getting up at 9:50, that didn't happen.

It was fine. We dealt. I was bitchy to the wedding party, especially since I was losing my voice and two of the guys were talking & fussing with paper lanterns when I was trying to explain something and be heard. I believe my exact words were "[cat hissing noise]." That is not an exaggeration.

I think that's about enough for now. Hopefully I'll get some teaser pics from Laura in the next few days so I can do a little more recapping - meanwhile, I'll work on feeling better! But for now I'll say this: I knew things would perk up, and they most certainly did. Here's what started the perking up (sorry, these are cell phone pics of the bouquet as it looks in my kitchen right now):

wedding week quickie #2

2008-10-22T01:54:00.003-04:00

I finished the escort charts and am happy with them! They took a lot longer than I expected, mostly because I wanted the sandwich boards to have the names listed alphabetically on both sides, and I ended up wiping off a lot of names several times when I realized I hadn't planned it right. That's all very boring. What's more interesting are the details:

3 wood-framed sandwich boards from eBay (contact me if you want more info) for about $20 each, including shipping - We can spray chalkboard paint on them afterwards and use them again (Tim will use them to advertise his Cornell concerts).
White and assorted colored paint pens from Michaels (used on all table number chalkboards and the millions of chalkboards that are all over the wedding)
4-5 hours of repeating MSNBC shows (Rachel Maddow, Keith Olbermann, Chris Matthews). Chris Matthews NEEDS to stop interrupting people. I'm terrible about interrupting. But he just sounds drunk and annoying, and I usually don't, I think.

In any case, I'm pretty happy with how the charts turned out. I could have done them more neatly, and I also could have been more patient when my white paint pens started to crap out on me, choosing to wait to finish until I could get new ones tomorrow. But I really wanted to get this done, so whatever. It looks like a farmers' market and it's imperfect and fine. I'm cool with that. I think the script/cursive/whatever you want to call it is a little hard to read, but Tim tells me it's fine. So good.

I don't have the energy or ambition to blur out all the names, but I took it with Mac PhotoBooth and am leaving it backwards. I'm pretty sure you can't read it anyway. If you're offended, let me know. I'll decide if I still like you.

quickie

2008-10-21T21:21:00.002-04:00

Thank you all [again] for your sweet comments. All is well and my dress is great. Marilyn did an AMAZING job, and I'm pretty stoked.

Off to make the table charts...

xoxo!

mallblograt (warning: vent. with no pictures. read at your own risk.)

2008-10-17T16:39:00.006-04:00

I had a rehearsal in Syracuse this morning (10-12:30) and have a concert tonight (8pm). Ithaca is 70 minutes away, and it didn't really make sense to drive back despite how much stuff I have to do. I brought my computer and the paper for the programs, fully intending to find a Kinko's - oh excuse me, FedEx Office - and FINALLY copy the program that I've been putting off for weeks.

Instead, I ended up at the mall. It's a much bigger, much nicer mall than anything close to Ithaca, and I have no problem admitting that I love me a mall. Yes, it's a little depressing, and yes, a lot of stuff looks the same, but I love feeling anonymous - it's especially great going to a mall somewhere you don't live, for that reason! I went to the Apple Store and got my computer looked at (I need more RAM), got Tim some stripy wedding socks with red and purple in them, a $10 pretty green silk sleeveless top from Old Navy, and some yummy-smelling foaming liquid soaps from Bath & Body Works. I'm a total sucker for those soaps. When I got here, I thought it would be awesome to go to a movie (Rachel Getting Married!) and really take the afternoon off if I was indeed going to avoid doing the programs, but nothing there appealed. So I walked until my feet hurt, got cranky looking at Macy's because there's so much shit in there and just generally WAY too much merchandise - it feels like a discount store since they bought out all those other stores, though some of their stores are better than others and this one SUCKS - and got myself an oven-roasted chicken breast sub on honey wheat with spinach, tomatoes, green peppers, spicy mustard, and Swiss cheese. From Subway. I'm not sure why I'm telling you this.

Anyway, I had a minor breakdown last night. For a while now, I've been panicking about my dress. I haven't wanted to admit it (to myself or anyone else), but I was really, really unhappy with how my dress looked when I left Seattle. It was like Chrissy just didn't understand my body. I'm not going to get into all the ins and outs of what was wrong with it, but I did feel like I was pretty clear about what I wanted, and I *KNOW* my measurements were correct, and honestly... she just fucked up. Like, it was several inches too short, it was too small and very awkward-fitting in the boobs, and it just did. not. fit. She worked really hard over the few days we were there to fix it, but I guess she just didn't have enough time to do a really careful job of it - she had machine-sewed a lot of parts that Marilyn (Milwaukee seamstress) ended up taking apart and hand-sewing so they'd look better, and there were some seams in really funky places (like the front middle, on the extra sheer fabric she had to add because she messed up the height/length measurement). I'm lucky that Marilyn was able to do a lot of great work on it, but I still don't have the dress. And it's stressing me out that I won't be able to try it on until Monday, when my mom gets into town. I'm having visions of having to rush-order five dresses from Nordstrom or Bloomingdale's or something, and hope that one fits. I think it'll be "fine," but everyone wants her dress to be better than "fine," right? I mean, even if it fits, it's still not exactly what I envisioned, and it's a bummer that I have this custom-made dress that's just not the perfect dress. Sigh.

So anyway, I was trying to revise seating/table assignments. I had them all done with mostly tables of 7/8/9/10, and those #s all go at the same size oblong table. 9 or 10 is a squeeze. Then we have ONE table of 6, which is round. The thing that bugs me is that we only have 100 guests, so 12 somewhat crowded tables in a fairly spacious room looks and feels strange. I decided that I wanted more 6-person tables. But I really liked the tables as they were, socially speaking. So I was freaking out. And I had only slept 5-6 hours two nights in a row, plus driven 2.5 hours both days, which for me is an absolutely disastrous combination. Tim was sitting there watching me come unraveled, and he offered to do the seating assignments - but he was just like, "oh, just take one couple from each of 3 tables and stick them together." AAAGGHHHHH!!!!! You can't do that!!! I can't even imagine. (Anyway, he took the papers away from me and was dealing with it today. We'll see how that goes.)

So when I panicked about that, I was like, "you want to see something I'm *really* worried about?" and showed him the post with the pics of me in my dress. I know, I know, curses!!! But I wanted to show him that I'm not being *completely* irrational (or maybe get a little encouragement that it's not as bad as I've been thinking it is). He was honest and said he thinks it's cool but will look much better when it fits better, and was really sweet about saying, "well, it's not like I saw 'your' dress - 'your' dress will fit you differently. It's different." Somehow that made me feel a little better.

But honestly, what I really need is several good nights' sleep, and I wish I just didn't have so much going on right now. I have 5 hours of teaching before driving to play tomorrow night's concert, and then drive to frickin' Geneva on Sunday to play a runout concert. And then my mom comes on Monday, which will not exactly bring calm to the masses despite helping out a tremendous amount. I guess this is what happens. Coffee is a good thing. (On that note, let's all thank my cousin for the amazing coffee she gave me...)

Ooh, I lied - I can give you some pictures: my rehearsal dinner dress, which fits me much better than my wedding dress, and the necklace I'm wearing with it. I love that the necklace is so busy and crazy but totally contained to the pendant, and I love the colors. And that it has silver and gold. Love it. I think I'm going to wear my knee-high brown suede boots that have beige stitching at the seams.

source

Craftiness

2008-10-14T20:46:00.004-04:00

I promise to take bunches of pictures this weekend and upload them. I know, that's incredibly lame of me. Tim has been hard at work making more adorable cartoons for our table numbers, as well as constructing our chuppah. I worked last night on the program and keep forgetting to take it to Kinko's (duh). I also finished up the photo display and attached all the pictures to twine with those impossibly cute mini clothespins that break when your hands are too big and clumsy (oops). And I did one trial of a ribbon (beribboned!) bouquet decoration, and made a ribbon crown for our flower chick to which some flowers will be added.

Right now, though, I'm going to eat, practice, and sleep. I start my new job with the Syracuse Symphony tomorrow - good timing, huh?

I'll leave you with the forecast that got my week off to a great start. It's nominally better now, and will undoubtedly change 10 more times over the next 10 days:

People, please. It's October. Are you trying to recreate this?

Beribboned

2008-10-06T01:52:00.006-04:00

Do you have certain words that you only saw in books, mispronounced in your head, and now have a hard time pronouncing correctly? For my mom, one of those words is "idiosyncrasy" - she apparently thought it was "ih-dee-AHZ-nih-cra-zee" when she was a kid. (Two little letters get innocently inverted and look what happens.) Now she just mispronounces it to be funny.

"Beribboned" is one of those words for me. I always thought it was "BERRY-boned." Haha!! Fortunately for me, it's not a word that generally comes up in daily conversation.

Anyway, right now I do want to talk about ribbons, and I have a DIY question for you. I love the look of the ribbons on this Ariella Chezar bouquet:

source

But I don't want to ask Audrey, who's doing our flowers, to do it - I'm already adding more work than I had originally asked her to do. Also... I can't cede power to anyone when I have a really clear idea of what I want. (The truth hurts.) So I was thinking - I have all this ribbon, champagne and bronze and ivory. I think those colors would look so pretty with the dark, jewel-toned flowers we're going to have. I'd like to make the ribbon cascades (for each of the bridesmaids and for myself) beforehand, and I don't think it'll be that hard once I figure out a method.

So... what should I use to hold them all together? I was thinking of using plain elastic, about 1/2 inch wide. I could staple? glue? each ribbon to the elastic, covering the elastic itself and overlapping each other so the final product is really voluminous. Then the whole thing can be tied around the bouquet.

Any suggestions? Has anyone done something like this before?

Bridesmaid swag

2008-10-06T00:29:00.011-04:00

Ladies (M, C, G, & H!), if you want to be surprised, stop reading NOW!!!

Now that they're out of the way, let's begin.

I have a maid of honor and three bridesmaids. I'll just provide short introductions, because I'll be honest - I get really bored reading about other people's friends.

Melissa, my maid of honor, has been my best friend since the summer before 6th grade. We've been through everything together. She is a much-loved elementary school orchestra teacher in Milwaukee (Shorewood actually) and is getting married in April! By that time I'll be her matron of honor. :-P Hate that term...

Christine (Chrissy) is a very close friend from middle/high school. She's a violist like me (though she played violin when we were in school together and switched about 6-7 years ago) and is getting her doctorate in viola performance at UW-Madison. She just got bangs and looks awesome. :-)

Gabby is a friend from grad school in Boston, though it's hard to believe we only met 6 years ago. We became friends really quickly, and we've been on many work-related trips together (Leipzig, Lucerne, Montgomery...). She's a phenomenal violinist who freelances in Boston and all over the world. We wear the same shade of makeup, which proves that we are sisters.

Hillary was there the night Tim and I met! We shared scorpion bowls at the Kong (website = much classier than restaurant). She's a really talented and creative composer who does a lot with electronics, and she's written pieces for Tim, me, and us as a duo. She also plays violin and is a great improvisor. She's working on her doctorate in composition at Harvard. (Tim and I often spend holidays with her amazing family in Maine.)

These amazing women are always there for me. They are really my friends for life. I really wanted to make up for the times that I haven't been able to buy them birthday/Xmas presents, or that I've been so busy I haven't made time for them. Basically, I wanted to get them really personal gifts that show them how much they mean to me. I got each of them a few of the same gifts but tried to personalize them, and then I got each one something personal.

OK, are you four still reading? Go away!!!

Ahem.

Now.

The first thing I bought for each of them (and each of the four groomsmen) is actually something Hillary gave me last Xmas in Maine. (Yes, I'm Jewish, but it was given to me on December 25!) It is seriously the BEST travel item I've ever owned, and since all four of them travel a lot, I thought it was perfect. Hillary's was lost with her luggage a year or so ago, so I know she doesn't have one anymore even though she's a diehard LL Bean Mainer!

L.L. Bean personal organizer

Each one of them will get the large size in a different color (well, two are getting purple), and the guys each get a medium black one (along with some other stuff).

Then I found some awesome pendants on Etsy, made with antique lace - each one is slightly different:

from Etsy seller WanderLustre, who even sent an extra pendant for me!! I also got matching silver rope chains for each one (from someone else), though unfortunately I didn't spring for very nice ones... so they kind of rip your hair out. :-(

Each of them will get a silk shawl to match their dress (two are wearing berry, and two are wearing eggplant... both food colors! hee hee), silkscreened by Jes with the allium/fiddlehead graphic. I don't have pics of those yet, but the shawls are a pinky-champagne color, and the ink is the color of each dress.

Then I tried to think of something each of them would need/want that's not music-related. That's hard, because although they have diverse interests, I know them first and perhaps best as musicians.

But Chrissy loves to cook:

All-Clad measuring spoons

Gabby mentioned in passing that she really wanted a new ring to replace the one she's worn for years:

"slender water ring" from Etsy seller JSurine

Hillary loves snowflakes and snow, and she even has a snowflake tattoo:

Demeter Fragrance Library "Snow"

and Melissa has a Labradoodle, Sophie, who is her pride and joy:

gift certificate to Metropawlis in Milwaukee, their fave pet store... I wanted to get Sophie a new collar (I generally really don't like gift certificates), but Melissa's mom told me Sophie is *very* particular!

I'm curious - if you had/have a wedding party, what did you do to thank them? Did you buy all of them the same thing, or did you find specific things that you knew each one would love?

Hello!

2008-10-03T17:11:00.004-04:00

Hey everybody, and welcome! Although I'm bummed about the reason I'm suddenly getting more traffic, I'm thrilled that you're here and hope you decide to stick around. Since I'm only 3 weeks away from my wedding, this blog will soon morph into (wife.) - craziness! But I hope I can be funny and interesting and irreverent enough to keep your interest. And thank you SO much for all your comments and support yesterday. I'm really glad so many of us are feeling the same way about the situation and can create a new kind of community.

I'm just back in my hotel room for a little while between a dress rehearsal and the opening of EMPAC (check out the slide show!) in Troy, NY. It's truly one of the most incredible concert halls I've ever seen and had the privilege to perform in, and it's a fantastic thing for the Albany area. I'm so excited to be playing with ICE tonight and tomorrow at the venue's gala opening. I have to go don my velvet fanciness (it's cold here!) and make pretty, but I'll be back soon with more weddingy goodness.

This flat-out sucks.

2008-10-02T14:35:00.005-04:00

Weddingbee was sold to eHarmony.

I don't know what else to say except that I'm really pissed off right now. I unsubscribed from Weddingbee in my Google Reader a few weeks ago for a number of reasons (mostly that I just wasn't that interested anymore, and the increasing number typos/misspellings/malapropisms really got to me), but I continued to sneak in once a day to feed my addiction. No more.

It's interesting that I read that post immediately after reading this (and all related comments). There are plenty of bloggers (wedding-related and otherwise) out there (here, here and here) whom I relate to much more than some of the new Bees, and with 24 days left until I'm married, I can do without the 'bee.

edited to remove links to Weddingbee, so eHarmony doesn't get lots of extra hits. Blech.

GO BREWERS!!!!!

2008-09-29T23:57:00.008-04:00

BREW CREW!!!!!

OK, got that out of my system.

Now, back to business.

One of my most difficult projects lately (as far as emotional attachment) has been narrowing down the farmers' market photos and photos of Tim & me that we're going to display clothesline-style. I had hundreds, cut it down to 150, and cut it down again to 70. I'm still trying to get rid of some, but first I need to decide which of our engagement photos to ADD to the pile. Sigh.

We were really happy with how our e-photos (taken at the end of May) turned out, especially because both of us were pretty nervous. I'm usually not anxious in front of the camera, but knowing how uptight Tim was about it made me less relaxed. Laura Kozlowski and her assistant, Peter, were amazing - I'm thrilled with the photos themselves, just not always the models!

So here are the ones still in the running - I haven't decided how many to print (4-5?), but I'd like to try to use one from each location. And I'd love to hear which ones are your favorites. Please comment below!! (Also, question for those of you familiar with Blogger: how can I set up the photos so they display larger when clicked on?)

We started out at an old abandoned barn close to our house:

... moved on to a field of gorgeous yellow flowers that Laura had seen (yes, I'm aware they bear resemblance to Claritin/Tampax/Valtrex ads, but the colors look amazing!!):

... hit the empty farmers' market:

... and finished up at Steamboat Landing, right next to the market:

All photos by the fabulous Laura and Peter. Please credit Laura Kozlowski.

Confession

2008-09-26T01:05:00.009-04:00

Tim and I are not neat people. It's not that we wouldn't like to be. We have high aspirations. But we have a LOT of stuff, a lot of music, a lot of mail... just basically a lot of shit lying around all over the place that we're not very diligent about straightening/putting away/sifting through. Oh, and doing dishes is an issue too. And when there's so much stuff around, it's harder to clean.

But basically... we're slobs. It pains me to admit it, but it's true. (I'm an uncurable perfectionist, so when I can't do *everything,* I do nothing. Brilliant.)

Since wedding stuff started piling up around and on top of our wood stove (lately, at an exponential rate), we've been a little apprehensive about having people over. I mean, it's basically a freakin' sty. I'll admit it. We get sad about it and flip out that it's a disaster, clean halfheartedly, and ultimately let it get to the exact same condition it was in before.

Balinese and Ghanaian drums not included in wedding paraphernalia.

By the way, the sculpture on the upper left is by our ketubah artist, Paul!

However. The night before the wedding, we're having a welcome party at our house. I don't know what I was smoking when I had that idea, but we (+ my mom) took it and ran with it. It's all right - it'll be fun. And now we have motivation to get things in better shape before my mom arrives on the 20th. I'm thinking we'll splurge on a cleaning service that week, but first we have to get all our crap put away so they can actually clean. (I wonder how much it would cost to get someone to do the putting away part, too...) I took TWO carloads of stuff to a consignment store and the Salvation Army a couple weeks ago - that was some good progress. And I've been slowly attacking the mail that piles up when I'm out of town and I then forget to go through. (Oops.)

So it's been slowly improving with my little surges of energy. Then today I decided that we should have our friends Chris & Sadie over to watch the debate (IF it happens... don't get me started) and have dinner.

Thus, we started cleaning.

And then...

I discovered my new best friend.

Hello, lovah.

Vacuuming soothes me. I love it. Unfortunately, Tim and I have never had a decent vacuum, so I had been using a crappy electric broom that's a sad excuse for an appliance. When I was growing up, though, it was the one chore I didn't have to be forced to do.

A couple weeks ago, I got a notice from Amazon that our vacuum cleaner had been purchased off our registry. I was PUMPED, but also perplexed - I mean, I also registered for a backyard composter and have been mercilessly made fun of for it, so why is something equally mundane OK? I went to the registry and discovered that it had been purchased by Kit, my dad's college and law school friend/roommate. I cracked up.

When my parents were dating long-distance (Boston-LA), my mom used to visit Kit and my dad's apartment and be totally horrified by the bachelor-pad nastiness of it. She would take the broom and start sweeping, but my dad was infuriated because sweeping was Kit's chore, and he didn't want her to do it. I don't know. It's convoluted and weird, and a little confusing that my dad would get mad at my *mom* for that, but whatever. Anyway, the story has evolved to some version of Kit coming home to my parents' trying to wrestle the broom away from each other. His note to Tim and me read, "May you never have to fight over the broom."

Seriously, I kind of went nuts with the vacuum. For almost an hour. Only downstairs. But I bet my allergies will improve now.

Anyone else have something they want to air? Please? (By the way, it is taking ever fiber of my being not to make SO many vacuum-related puns right now. But I guess I'm on a self-improvement kick.)

p.s. T minus one month!!!

No Zzzzz

2008-09-23T09:16:00.000-04:00

Maybe it's the prednisone (though the dosage is really low), but more likely it's the 9 channels of static that are competing for attention in my head. Tim went to sleep around 12:30 last night, and I said I'd be up soon. We used to almost never go to bed at different times, but my sleep schedule is just messed. up. lately. (OK, that's not totally true. At all. For several years I've woken up almost every night in the middle of the night for at least an hour, but I never had trouble falling asleep, or waking up more than once.)

I stayed downstairs staring at How Do I Look? on TV and listlessly clicking things on my laptop to see what I'm behind on and/or on top of, wedding-wise. Emailed a few people. Facebooked. Then I trudged upstairs, "read" some US Weekly (I swear I'm not as vacuous as this paragraph is making me sound), and tried to sleep. Woke up at 4 to go to the bathroom. Woke up again at 7 and came downstairs to do the same crap on my computer. Still here. Still tired. Still want to sleep more. (9:15 AM... ahem... yeah, musicians' schedules are a little different from normal people's.)

But my brain is going apeshit. I know it's because of the wedding, and I know I should shut the stupid computer... I just can't seem to make myself do it. Will it be better once I'm so exhausted I have no choice but to sleep, or am I not going to be able to press pause on the brain drool until October 27?

Any of you have chronic insomnia? Advice?

NWR - in memoriam.

2008-09-21T23:44:00.000-04:00

I have never gotten through Infinite Jest (it's been pointed out to me that it might be because there are no major female characters, which is a very valid argument IMHO), but I've read many of David Foster Wallace's essays and short stories over the 6.5 years Tim and I have been together. I guess I'm not what some (including... ahem... my future husband) would consider a huge fan because I haven't read his entire oeuvre, but I am in awe of his writing. He was a genius on so many levels. Tim, who has read essentially every word DFW ever wrote, said last week, "He wrote how the inside of my head feels." He doesn't feel comfortable having me put that in here, but I feel like it succinctly describes how many people (including A.O. Scott of The New York Times - please read this beautifully written obituary) feel.

source

David Foster Wallace committed suicide last week at his California home after, according to his father, many, many years battling depression.

more here, here, and here, and many others.

thank you.

One more thing about the cake...

2008-09-21T23:31:00.000-04:00

I know it sounds weird. I know many people don't like beets. But I urge you to read this post (bonus: my grandpa's time-tested actual recipe is there), make the recipe (it's easy--canned beets!--and cheap), and decide for yourself. Comment below when you're done...

my photo

Timmy's first DIY!*

2008-09-21T22:50:00.000-04:00

For as long as we've been together, Tim has drawn silly cartoons for me. He's really good at it (though he doesn't like to admit it), but when I decided to set up the cupcakes like a veggie patch, I knew I wanted to enlist him to make the garden patch signs. I wish I could draw well, but he's just soooooo much better at it. I try not to let it upset me. :-P

They'll be oversized compared to what else is going on in the veggie patch...

source

I know this is somewhat ridiculous, but I think it'll be totally adorable and just couldn't resist. I bought the 3 sections of the fence, wheelbarrow, tool set, and watering can. Sorry, no fairies. Since my mom and I are making the cupcakes (it'll only be 3 batches or so), we're saving a decent amount of money on the cake. Hello, rationalization!

...but I want people to see the signs in their full glory (lettering is mine, which is why is looks sort of like D'Nealian... and sorry for the terrible cell-phone-camera video):

Here they are, before being cut and put onto popsicle-stick stakes! Pretty adorable (and random/bizarre), no? Just like Timmy...

If you listen carefully, you can hear me snickering and the sweet sounds of What Not To Wear in the background at around 0:50.

*As a percussionist/professional tinkerer, Tim actually DIYs stuff ALLLLL the time. But this is his first wedding-related DIY, aside from teaming up with me to make the %^*#$&^ throwies that are FINALLY done!

The flower chick

2008-09-21T21:49:00.001-04:00

I wasn't sure we could have a flower girl until fairly recently, because our prospective flower girl's mom, Katherine, teaches preschool and had to make sure she could get a vacation day (for the day after the wedding). But YAY, they can come! I'm sad that husband/dad Michael can't come because of work, but it will be awesome to have Katherine and Ariel there for the festivities. And I hear that Ariel is pretty excited to be a flower girl for the second time in four months... and get a new dress for it! :-)

K&A eating fondue on a trip to Paris and the Netherlands this summer!

I've known Katherine for about 17 years - she lived in Milwaukee during my teenage years (she's about 10 years older than I am). She moved to NYC just before I went to college, married Michael, had Ariel, and I only just reconnected with her about 3 years ago when I started making more frequent trips to NYC. It's hard for me to believe it's been such a short time since we got back in touch, because they're a huge part of my life - I stay with them in Brooklyn for long stretches, get my own space in the basement of their great house, and have a fantastic quality of life that's hard to match when you're crashing on friends' couches. (I've recently reconnected with other friends with extra space for me, which is wonderful, and that way it takes a little longer to wear out my welcome with one friend/couple/family.)

Anyway, the best part of it has been having this extended Brooklyn family and a little sister-type I never had. I *LOVE* Ariel. She is spunky, cute, smart, and majorly fun. She's also 9 years old, which enables us to have a slightly more grown-up relationship than I might have had with a tiny tot flower girl. Ariel plays violin scarily well, and she usually plays for me when I'm there.

I wanted her to wear a teal dress to match the Holy Grail teal in my dress (it has been a little hard to match), and the color will look amazing on Ariel. Also, although it didn't work out to have the bridesmaids wear "real-life" dresses, I absolutely didn't want K&M to spend a lot of money on something she'll grow out of in 5 minutes and only have worn once. The dress she wore for the other wedding was really fancy, and I told Katherine it was probably a little too much for our less formal wedding. I didn't want to leave her hanging, so I started hunting. Rarely do I have trouble shopping, but I was hard-pressed to remember stores with cute tween clothes! I looked at a few stores I often search for my own clothes online: Nordstrom, Macy's, and Boden. Here's the first one I found:

source

So cute, and a reasonable price - Boden also has coupons for some % off and free shipping, so it would have been a little under $40. Katherine thought it might be a bit too little-girly for Ariel, and I also thought the corduroy might not be dressy enough, especially next to the chiffon bridesmaid dresses. So the search continued.

I looked on eBay and found several great options, which I promptly emailed to Katherine, and one of them was from Limited Too. I've often walked by that store and thought they had really cute stuff. I always shopped at The (grownup) Limited when I was a teenager. I checked out their website and found two promising options:

source (both dresses)

I hoped K&A would like the solid teal one more, but honestly I really just wanted Ariel to be happy in what she ended up with. So - here it is:

Doesn't she look fabulous? She got some cute black shoes, too. I think she's going to wear a flower crown, though perhaps not this one - here she is practicing her [very serious] flower girl routine:

Since Jewish weddings don't traditionally have kids involved as flower girls and ring bearers, Ariel is going to serve both functions and carry a single one of these with our rings tied to it:

source

I received it the other day, and it is even cuter in person! You can personalize the ribbon color, so I got purple & red that just so happen to match quite nicely and also make it plenty girly for Ariel. The "pillow" looks bigger in the picture and is actually only 4" in diameter, so it's a perfect size for a kid to carry. The best part? $10!

Centerpeace.

2008-09-21T20:39:00.000-04:00

One of the first things I blogged about (and the post I've referenced a zillion times) was the Knot centerpiece inspiration. Here it is one more time:

source

I really wanted to grow the "stuff" in the centerpieces myself. In fact, at one point I posted a query to the Weddingbee boards. A few people recommended groundcover, which would be easy to grow - and one of them was Amy, before we "knew" each other! But I decided that it was just too much for me. I would have loved to have home-grown centerpieces, but I figured homemade was almost/just as good. Here they are - sorry for the crappy pictures and the mess in the background!

wood trays (about $5 apiece) from Jamali Garden (mentioned in earlier post)
beige/neutral-colored craft moss from Michaels; I used two large bags of it at $3.99 each to fill all 24 trays.
lanterns from eBay: with shipping, about $5 each
teal satin ribbon from the A.C. Moore dollar bin (!!!)
inside the lanterns: soy tea lights from Etsy seller Worthy Soy Candles. They last a lot longer (about 6 hours!) than wax and are substantially better for the environment (about $0.50 each).
Dollar Tree easels ($1 each) - we painted them copper because they were different colors.
chalkboards - $0.50 each at A.C. Moore
The ugly fake gourds will be replaced by small [real] apples, and the chalkboards will also have little cartoons of different apple varieties. (How creative can you get with this? We'll see. But you'll get a taste of Tim's adorable and slightly warped cartoon handiwork soon.)

The total cost (~$14 each, once all is said and done... plus the chalk pens that will be used for the escort chart and many other things, so I'll move them to that part of the budget :-D) was a little more than I hoped to spend ($10), but it's still half as much fresh flowers would be. I lurve fresh flowers, but we'll still have plenty of them on the buffet tables and in the ceremony. I like the variety this adds, and people will be able to take components home (or I can resell them). It's also very rustic-ally elegant, don't you think?

remember me?

2008-09-21T20:00:00.000-04:00

The onetime blogger who used to post 3x/week? Yeah... August and September, not so much.

This weekend has brought what I've been dreading: a flare-up. Ugh. I will spare you details, but let me just tell you, it SUCKS. I've had UC since I was 19 and have been extremely lucky to be in remission most of the time, but every couple years, it gets the better of me. UC is exacerbated by stress and anxiety, so it's a wonder I don't have a constant flare-up (thank you, SSRIs!). It's also very lucky that this happened now instead of closer to the wedding. Sadly, I had to cancel a trip to NYC (for meetings and a rehearsal, to see Jes, to stay with my adorable flower girl and her family... and see her dress!!!, and to see my friend Ty) so I could stay curled up on the couch and [very] close to the bathroom. :( Tim has been taking excellent care of me, although he's being a little b*tch about making me stay on the BRAT diet... yeah, yeah, I know it's good for me, but I'm so bored with the boring food. I also have to take prednisone [a steroid] for a few days, which wreaks havoc on my sleep habits because it's such an upper. But I'd rather have my tummy feel better.

Hey, where'd they put my applesauce?

source

Regardless of the pain and discomfort, this absolutely forces me to slow down and take it easy for a few days. We were the lucky, lucky, LUCKY recipients of a wedding-gift hammock stand from our friends Brian & Molly, who sadly can't come to the wedding. I bought a hammock before we moved into this house (so, June 2007), because there are so many trees in the backyard I thought there would be tons of places to hang it. Alas, most of the trees are on the edge of a small hill, so it's impossible. But the hammock stand arrived this week, Tim set it up yesterday, and we spent several glorious hours lying in the beautiful rainbow-colored hammock. I looooooove it! It's dark out now, so I can't take a picture. But the hammock and our backyard are exactly what I pictured when we moved to Ithaca. It makes me so happy. (And I could still run in to go to the bathroom!)

kind of like ours. only NOT as awesome. :-D

source

Satin and bows and droooooool

2008-09-15T01:34:00.000-04:00

I think it's worth a full post to note that I just bought these:

Gulp. Delman. I'm not going to tell you how much they cost, because I ordered one pair from Amazon that may or may not be too small, and one pair from Endless that may or may not be too big. Size difference: 1/2. Price difference: 3x. Strangeness factor: Endless (the more expensive pair) is RUN by Amazon. ?!

If I keep the more expensive pair, do I get credit for finding the bargain ones (I mean, the expensive ones were STILL a bargain, for Delman)? Also, I got 10% cash back here. By the way, if you do any kind of online shopping and don't know about Cashbaq and Ebates, SIGN UP NOW. Wait, contact me before you do it. I think we can both get $5 referral bonuses. No strings, except the signing up part - which benefits you. I have gotten over $100 back in the last 8 months. (Also, google for coupon codes before you order anything.)

In any case, I am in love with the shoes... at least, prior to my trying them on, which will happen when pair #1 shows up at my door on Tuesday (or, more accurately, in front of the garage if they're shipped UPS... mental note: re-stick note telling UPS guy NOT to leave packages directly in front of garage door where they can be driven over). They will be sufficiently pranced in.

In other news, I'm leaving Milwaukee in a few hours, sans dress and sans [much] sleep - the seamstress here is tweaking a few more things, which is great. I didn't think I would really be so fussy about something fitting me absolutely perfectly, but who am I kidding? Of course I want it to be perfect. Just because I don't think I'm a bridey-bride doesn't mean my clothes shouldn't fit. It's more that I thought I might be easier to fit and I wouldn't have to speak up so much about the things that are bugging me about the dress. But I know I'll absolutely love it when it's done. All I have to say is this (a repeat of my Facebook status from earlier this evening): I never thought I'd use the words "crinoline" and "me" in the same sentence.

But tonight I did, and I think I'm really happy about it! There will be a small, un-stiff crinoline under my dress to make the A-line smoother. Although it means my mom will have to bring the dress with her to Ithaca when she comes 6 days before the wedding, I'm really happy that I mentioned the crinoline idea and that Marilyn (awesome Milwaukee seamstress - THANK YOU Melissa!!!) agreed that it was wise.

Goodbye stream of consciousness... hello zzzzzzzzz.......

Oh my Gocco, part infinity and beyond!!!

2008-09-06T00:32:00.000-04:00

Tim and I are away for the weekend, so I won't have much computer time - but I just got a very exciting email about a brand-new Etsy shop, and I couldn't wait to share:

source

"Squishy Amy" is selling beautifully Gocco-ed greeting cards at extremely reasonable prices. The two she's offering now are simple but colorful designs that will delight anyone who receives them. I am so in love with the card above - it's vintage-y, whimsical, and sweet without being too cutesy, and the colors are right up my alley. I think her cards would make a great gift as a set, or you can buy them for yourself and send them out to your friends individually. I am seriously impressed by the perfect details on those berries.

I'm so thrilled that Amy has opened her Etsy shop and can't wait to see what else she has up her crafty little sleeve. You should also check out her blog - there are some awesome recipes on there!

source

Oh my Gocco!

2008-09-02T00:33:00.000-04:00

No, I didn't get one. But Amy did!

When I left for Vermont a few weeks ago, I was informed that a special package would be waiting for me when I got home. Best. Surprise. EVER.

24 (?) folding cards and envelopes, perfectly Gocco-ed on lovely cream stationery and wrapped with a happy yellow and orange polka-dotted ribbon!!! And a very sweet note. :-) They were ideal for the shower thank-you notes I needed to sit down and write, and nice stationery makes such a huge difference in my note-writing motivation. And I got a bunch of compliments on them, which is awesome - people don't normally comment on a thank-you note! I still have a few left and am definitely going to save the last one to frame and keep on my desk. I lurve them.

I have yet to reciprocate, but fear not - I have some ideas floating around. Nothing will be that thoughtful and perfectly-executed, though. Can you believe this was only her second Gocco project?!

Amy rules.

Non-wedding related: finding humor in the face of unfunniness.

2008-09-01T20:50:00.001-04:00

PBS is currently showing Antiques Roadshow because of the RNC's hurricane-related cancellations. I'll let you connect the dots about why that strikes me as funny. Hint: the initials "JSM."

Well, aren't I forgetful?!

2008-09-01T17:11:00.000-04:00

First, let me just say that my favorite nonstandard punctuation mark is the interrobang. (We all know what my favorite standard punctuation mark is.) I mean, just the name is amazing. Also, I want this:

Someone who shall remain anonymous just asked over my shoulder, "Do you have less-favorite nonstandard punctuation marks?"

Anyway.

After my last post, I realized that I hadn't ever posted about the super-awesome original graphic from....... you guessed it, an Etsy artist. The image that Jes used on the tie is also currently being turned into a rubber stamp, and said image isn't just any floral pattern. I mentioned a while back (wow, I've referenced that post so many times!) that I wanted to create boutonnieres out of drumstick allium (representing Tim) and fiddleheads (representing me). And, as I said then: awwww. Unfortunately, both are spring plants, and neither is that easy to find in dried or silk form... at least not from the same sites. It was becoming too much of a headache. I found a few inspiration photographs that fit Jes's guidelines (essentially, detailed but not too) and got to work. After determining that my art skills remain planted firmly in eighth grade, when I was actually decent, I set up yet another Alchemy request on Etsy and hit yet another jackpot. Beth of wildemoon replied to my post: she's a professional graphic designer and told me that she could 1) complete the project very quickly and 2) put it into vector format for Jes. Right on!!! Her communication was unbelievably awesome, and she went through several different versions of the image before I was totally happy with it. Here it is in its final glory:

I love, love, LOVE it! It's going on OOT bags, programs, wedding party-wear, and a few other goodies. Also, I really like that both plants (allium=garlic; fiddleheads are often sauteed) are food-related. :-D

What do you think?(!?!)

stupid tie-tle

2008-08-31T02:32:00.000-04:00

A couple weeks ago, I was in NYC for a recording session and planned to get together with Jes Switaj, the incredible designer who's creating bridesmaids' shawls (I let cat out of the bag as far as their getting shawls is concerned :-( , but I'll be more careful when I post pictures), groomsmen's ties, and a jacket for me. Jes had already purchased fabric for the shawls and some of the ties, but the teal that's in my dress is a little different from what I'd wanted for Tim's tie, and I've had a really hard time finding complementary colors. Jes suggested that we go to the Garment District to pick out fabric for his tie and for my jacket. (It'll be a very simple, open jacket made of sheer ivory organza, with 3/4-length sleeves and a little bit of champagne velvet trim on the front.)

This was the initial inspiration. I thought about ordering it, but things that are supposed to be somewhat short/cropped always come up to my boobs. Also, the pleats are very cool but might compete with the embroidery on the dress - so basically, I'm not sure why I'm showing you this picture. Filler?

Jes is new in NYC (she and her boyfriend just moved from Arizona), and she's already really busy. She already has a 9-to-5 internship with a women's clothing designer and texted me today to tell me she thinks she has a paid job starting this week. That's pretty amazing to find a job in your field in NYC right after moving there. But, as you can see from looking at her Etsy site and her blog, her designs and her work are creative and impeccable.

She's also frickin' gorgeous. (Wearing one of her own designs.)

So back to that suggestion that we go to the Garment District. My rehearsal went longer than I anticipated, and I didn't get to her apartment until about 5. We took the subway to the very top of the district at 42nd street, where fabric store after fabric store lie in the filthy shadow of Penn Station. Holy shit, these fabric stores are CRAZY! Most of them were immigrant-owned/operated (or at least people whose first language isn't English), and although I don't want to presume to guess exactly which countries they were from, we visited stores run by people from at least three non-North-American continents. Pretty awesome.

This store looks a lot bigger and more spacious than the ones we were in, but the caption on the source says it all.

When I walked into these places, I kind of didn't know where to start. Jes was totally patient with me, but I was sort of overwhelmed and wandered around in a bit of a daze for a couple hours. I knew exactly what colors and fabrics I had in mind, but I've never been in a fabric store like that before: every last inch from front to back, floor to ceiling, is covered in bolts of wildly different fabrics, from white lace to wool tweeds to Pucci-esque prints on polyester to holographic lame (sorry, can't figure out the accent mark). The setup varies ever-so-slightly from store to store, but not enough to catch your breath in between. And nothing is labeled (as in, no "silks" or "poly blends" or "jersey" signs). It looks so beautiful and wonderful, but when you're with someone you don't know very well (who I did get to know that day, and she's RAD - yes, I said "rad") and you're on a specific mission, it's stressful. I think I handled it all right, but it was a tiring expedition.

It was really easy to find stuff I knew wasn't right, and for a while Jes and I joked around holding up stupid fabrics and saying, "This is perfect!" But I think that got old for both of us pretty fast. It was just...... SO MUCH! After going through about 6 stores without much luck (a lot of things were close but not quite right, like the ivory with a lemony-yellow-tinge chiffon? organza? that the store owner just handed to us for free, trying to convince me there was no yellow in it), we finally found a tie fabric and a jacket fabric I'm happy with. I'm sure **both** Jes and I are happy there were only two choices to make. :-)

On our way back to Brooklyn to do some fitting, we stopped at the Italian bakery Jes's boyfriend works at around Chelsea (?), and got some much-needed coffee and H2O. It was a really fun day, and as Amy said, I'm "so lucky to get to hang out all day with someone from Etsy!" I know that might sound silly, but it's true. Jes is a really awesome person and so sweet, and it's great to become friends with someone you're working with. Actually, it's great to have a new friend, period!

In case you're wondering, we didn't go to Mood (where the Project Runway designers go on the show) - Jes said it's really expensive. HOWEVER. She did text me the day after we went shopping, and she had just seen Suede at one of the stores we'd been at! She thought he was probably shopping for his Fashion Week collection but couldn't talk to him because he was on the phone. I wonder if he was talking in third person.

And speaking of Jes texting me, she just sent this pic.... yay!!! I love it. This one will be Tim's, and the groomsmen will wear either red or purple (to complement the two red/two purple bridesmaids' dresses). I think it matches the teal on my dress pretty well, don't you? :-D

Thanks, Jes!!!

p.s.

2008-08-28T01:48:00.000-04:00

I wanted to show the Martha-style wraparound labels I used for the invitations. Sorry it took so long to post these pictures!

It was 3 AM after we got back from Ty and Vinayak's wedding, and Tim and I had to leave my parents' house at 5... so I wasn't so focused on getting the labels from all angles. I forgot to get the back, which was my parents' return address printed at a 90 degree angle to the addressee's address (does that make sense? I'm sleepy now too...). The font is Cantabile (a music word! it means "sung" or "singing") from dafont, and the labels are brown kraft from Labels by the Sheet. I really love how the color contrasts with Stephanie's cream paper and adds even more textural interest. Stamps are the Charles and Ray Eames (furniture) ones, which I love... we ran out of those and got vintage-y baseball stamps (not vintage stamps, just USPS's current vintage style), which were even more perfect!

I tore the right side of the label on one of them accidentally (actually my brother and SIL's), and I really liked how it looked. In a rash burst of creativity, I decided to do it to all of them. My mom HATED it. I thought that was pretty funny. I know, I'm perverse. I get that from my dad. (Sorry mom... if you happen to be reading.)

Here we go!

2008-08-28T00:47:00.000-04:00

Well, yesterday was T minus I do know how many days. It's two months, everybody!!! And today was T minus two months to my sister-in-law's due date. And Friday is my parents' 37th wedding anniversary. Dizzamn.

I've been busy uploading pictures with my new Dynex DX-CRMN1, which I bought instead of a cable ($10 less). I had somewhere around 400 pictures I needed to upload, and I'm not about to make Blogger crash completely around the planet by trying to put all of them on here right now. But here's a picture-heavy post for you. However, because I'm so damn behind on blogging, I'm going to take a little poll. Let me know in the comments which of these photos pique your interest, and I'll post about the ones that seem to make people the most excited. Hooray!

SHOWER

1. The shower hostess gifts, wrapped and ready to go.

2. My lovely SIL, Hillary, and me (wearing requisite crown).

3. My beautiful mom, after I tired of the crown. :-)

MELLOW BACHELORETTE DAY

1. MOH Melissa shows the difficult decision we had to make.

2.-3. BM Chrissy (Christine) and I model totally hot sunglasses at Fred Boutique in Milwaukee's hip Third Ward.

4.-5. Roots Cellar and the veggie burger that made my head spin... and not in a good way. :( (Good story, though!)

6. The three of us outside Roots - the Milwaukee skyline was really hard to capture at night, but it looked gorgeous!

TY AND VINAYAK'S WEDDING (NAPERVILLE, IL)

1. This is one of about 70 pictures I took during the Hindu ceremony (even Vinayak's dad was camera-happy)... unfortunately, I was playing during the ecumenical ceremony and didn't get to take pictures. Ty's dad and my dad lived down the hall from each other in college and were also at the same school (but different programs) in grad school. After growing up a few hours from each other and seeing each other's families once in a while, Ty and I ended up living in Cambridge, MA, at the same time for a little while. She's a really wonderful friend, and this wedding was so special. I hadn't met Vinayak before the rehearsal dinner, but after talking to him for 3 minutes, I could see exactly how perfect he is for Ty.

2. My adorable dad. Not sure whose fingers those are on his shoulder...

TIM'S AND MY TRIP DOWN BOSTON'S MEMORY LANE (or, Wendy drags Tim around Boston to take pictures she can display at the wedding)

1.-2. A very small representation of our favorite restaurants - we celebrated many special dates at Dali. Dogwood Cafe has great pizza and was our favorite neighborhood hang in JP (a block from our old place).

3. We spent 10 weeks working for the American Repertory Theater and had the chance to play at the very cool Zero Arrow Theater.

and finally......

4. Ah, 84 Ellery Street in Cambridge. The site of our first kiss. Also the site of my being a total bitch to Tim and not letting him leave his heavy bag in my apartment OR in the trunk of my car, for fear of... ahem... something happening. I was determined not to like him. Yes, he felt the need to re-enact that experience.

MIA

2008-08-26T00:16:00.000-04:00

Perhaps it's because of the still-missing camera cable. (I promise I'll replace it, I promise!) Or maybe it's that I've been dreading listening to 22 violists play excerpts from The Planets tomorrow and have just been avoiding life in general. Maybe it's that I am spending too much time on kitten blogs. Could it be that I'm overwhelmed by my foray into DIY weddingness and am embarrassed to show you pictures? Oh wait, I can't show you pictures. Heh.

Whatever it is, I'm forcing myself to get back on the horse and write this post so that I'll 1) go buy a new camera cable and 2) post soon. Really.

By the way, the replacement LEDs came, and the color is great. Unfortunately, I had to buy water-clear ones and am in the process of painstakingly sanding ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY of them to make them diffuse. Oh boy is it fun. Fingernails and chalkboards spring to mind, even with 400-grit sandpaper.

Source. No, ours are not red...

LEDisaster

2008-08-13T00:18:00.000-04:00

The Fontainebleau can get pretty dark inside, so for a while I've been planning to use paper lanterns with throwies to add some light and to decorate the rustic dining room. Because the main purpose is to provide light, I wanted warm white LEDs inside white lanterns. Diffuse LEDs should provide even, un-spotty light.

I ordered LEDs and batteries from eBay and received the second package (the lights themselves) today, so tonight Tim and I started the project of putting them together. It's surprisingly easy, and we got into a rhythm and made about 50 before we realized that OH! we should probably test them inside the lanterns.

Well.

They're yellow. And not so mellow. Like a freakin' brick road. (The weird part is that our "diffuse warm white" LEDs look just that when they're off. Turn 'em on and it's a very. different. story.)

Pardon my language, but....... F*CK. F*CK. F*CK. First of all, we just made 50 of these damn things, which admittedly didn't take that long. But I can't return the LEDs ($60) or the batteries ($30). And now I have to buy more LEDs (or rent the whole shebang... maybe cheaper at this point?***), or... no lanterns. It's obviously not such a huge deal that I should feel as unreasonably sad as I do right now, but it's just not cool.

And if I could find that stupid camera cable, you could see the evidence for yourselves. But for now, you'll just have to use your imagination, or refer to this.

***or not: check it out.

More paper love, and a few more Etsy goodies.

2008-08-12T12:39:00.000-04:00

I had **five** shower hostesses (lucky me!), including my maid of honor, Melissa; her mom, Connie; my other high-school-friend bridesmaid, Christine (Chrissy); close family friend Ellie; and my one and only aunt, Merle. Of course, I wanted to get them hostess gifts they'd all like... but practically speaking, trying to find five super-personalized gifts was going to be really time-consuming. However, I did want to make each gift at least slightly individual. I got each of them a set of personalized stationery made by Stephanie, who graciously (as always) agreed to make these rather last-minute:

Melissa is the only one who didn't get her last name on hers -

she's getting married in April and is changing her name,

so I thought ahead (just in case she doesn't use them all by then)! :-D

Then, I got each of the "grown-up" ladies some of these gorgeous soaps from Amethyst Soaps:

I gave Ellie the amethyst because it's her birthstone,

and she has a stunning amethyst ring I've always loved.

Connie got an assortment of turquoise, and

Merle received the dahlia plus a few small turquoise soaps.

Chrissy isn't a big coffee drinker, but that doesn't stop her from loving a walk down the streets of Madison with a hot drink. Melissa, like me, is a total addict. I got each of them one of these re-usable "java jackets" from CupKozy:

I wish I'd ordered one for myself - they roll up,

attach to your keychain, and are SO lightweight. Love it.

Chrissy's is gray flannel, and Melissa's is black - like her coffee. :-)

If I could find my &$^(* camera cable, I'd post pictures of my cute wrapping job: multi-colored tissue paper, bright yellow bags, and brown kraft paper crinkles. I was very excited about how pretty they looked. If/WHEN I find the stupid freakin' charger, I'll add pictures to this post.

I love finding such clever and creative things on Etsy. Whenever I talk to someone who hasn't heard of it, I start proselytizing. All hail Etsy. Do you have any Etsy secrets?

First - and most gorgeous - things first.

2008-08-11T15:09:00.000-04:00

Long ago, I posted about our beautiful save-the-dates. Without further hoopla, I present their larger and lovelier siblings - the invitations!

outside of invitation - circle punch highlighting partial graphic

postcard reply card

And... the inside of the invitation! Hard to see detail in this photo, but the slightly brighter circles

were painstakingly glued on by the phenomenal Stephanie of Stelie Designs.

Thanks to Photoshop Express for identity protection - I must tell you how proud I am that I figured it out. :-)

I am not too proud to admit that several ideas (the can't wait! can't make it; the song requests) were cribbed from bloggers whose identities I can no longer recall but for whose creativity I am eternally grateful. What goes around, comes around: I hope others will like what they see here and feel free to steal liberally!

Most importantly, I cannot stress enough how absolutely AMAZING Stephanie has been to work with. She has been so open to all my ideas at every step along the way, and she is so creative, attentive to detail, and genuinely sweet & kind. When I look through my gmail account, I'm slightly embarrassed at the number of emails we exchanged over the past 6 months, but she never seemed bothered at the amount of communication. In fact, I really feel like I made a new friend through this process. :-)

I'm so grateful to Stephanie for 1) being hands ***way*** down my favorite wedding-related person to work with and 2) creating save-the-dates and invitations that are both exactly what I wanted and far better than I could have imagined! She even included several extras along the way, including two beautiful sets of cards (one set personalized "Wendy & Tim") and a lovely pair of earrings that are so "me" from VanDiva. I also sneaked a peek at her Etsy favorites and sent her a VanDiva bracelet as a far-too-small thank you for the phenomenal work she did for us.

Please visit Stephanie's store and blog and support her gem of a business!

absent, but not forever...

2008-08-08T18:40:00.000-04:00

It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks, culminating in a concert tomorrow in Killington, VT. I really will be back and blogging in a few days, just as soon as I learn the rest of these notes... and then recover!

A few things to look forward to:

pictures of the awesome (if I do say so myself) gifts for my shower hostesses
my mom's poem in honor of my shower
the best invitations EVER (and the labels I really loved, even if my mom didn't)

Thank you so much for all of your thoughtful comments on my previous post - everything turned out completely fine, though I'm glad to have that little bump out of the way. The shower was a lot of fun, and it was wonderful to see so many people. It was totally exhausting being the center of attention for that long!!

More soon!

To open, or not to open?

2008-07-29T00:51:00.000-04:00

So after Saturday's post, I was horrified--out of embarrassment, not anger--to hear that Melissa (my best friend of 18 years/MOH) and her mom were a little upset that I had started opening the gifts that had been shipped prior to the shower. I feel terrible! I guess I didn't realize that it would be viewed by some as really crass, and although I know all the guests are expecting me to be surprised by what they've brought, I guess... well, I guess I was thinking I could successfully feign surprise. (Of course, many things will be from the registries, but the important part is the person who bought the gift.) At this point, though, I know I should "act surprised" when I open gifts, and fortunately I'm a decent actor.

But in my defense, I *did* think it through before I began opening things. Here's my rationale:

When you receive wedding gifts prior to the wedding, etiquette dictates that you open them and write thank-you notes as they arrive. I know that this situation is different because a shower is basically thrown so that the bride can open gifts in front of everyone and be surprised, but I was able to get a head start on the thank-yous for the gifts that had large and visible "FROM" tags.

A few gifts didn't have those tags, and I decided to set aside the cards (marking on the envelope what the gift was) so that even though I knew I had received something from our registry, I didn't know who the gift was from. A little weird, I guess, but this way there's still some element of surprise.

source

Our house 1) was a mess before we started planning our wedding, 2) no longer has a visible wood stove because of my wedding-crap repository, and 3) couldn't even handle the three large boxes I waited several days to open, thinking I might be able to hold off opening the shower gifts that were starting to arrive. But given the excessive packaging companies use, I didn't have a fighting chance. We've already made one major trip to the recycling center with a carload of cardboard, and Tim alerted me today that another is impending.

Has anyone else had a shower like this, with an awkward gift-arrival purgatory? Or have you had a similar experience in any way? How did you handle it? If you're lurking and have an answer, ***please*** come out of the woodwork! I want to be absolved before... oh.... 6:30 CDT Tuesday.

Make that 6:25, so I can enjoy a signature drink.

July showers!

2008-07-26T23:43:00.000-04:00

I'm distracted by my desire for a Popsicle and can't think of a clever title.

Tomorrow Tim and I are going to NYC to play a show at The Stone. It's a really cool venue I've never had the opportunity to play, and I'm also pretty sure that some old friends (some of whom I've known for 15+ years!) are going to show up. I think it'll be pretty fun!

Then, after staying overnight (hi Sarah! thanks!!!), I'm flying to Milwaukee for some shower madness. My shower is being thrown by my MOH Melissa, her mom, my bridesmaid Christine, a very close family friend, and my aunt. I'm so excited to see all of them and have also seen the guest list, which is full of wonderful people I haven't been able to spend much time with in a long time. I've always been nervous about the idea of a shower because of the gift-opening thing, but I realize that it's really an opportunity for people to do something EXTREMELY nice and generous - so I'm really grateful for it. I think Melissa, Christine, and I might also have some low-key bachelorette activity. Low-key = operative term, if you're reading, girls!

[insert offensive image here]

no thank you, to both image placement and activity participation

Because it's an out-of-town shower, the hostesses were very thoughtful to ask that guests send their gifts directly to Ithaca, bringing a picture, a poem, or a token gift to the shower itself. Since some of them are apparently quite on top of things, gifts began to arrive at our house about a week ago... like this beauty, from my parents' good friend:

Angela Adams duvet cover from Bed Bath & Beyond

And this, from a close friend from our old synagogue, whom I've known since childhood:

Bodum thermal beer glasses from Bed Bath & Beyond

I must disclose that I've been enjoying those glasses so much already that I keep washing them so I don't have to use our old ones. :-) (I knowwww, some etiquette mavens would say I shouldn't be using them before I write the thank-you note... but I needed to get those boxes out of the house! Right? Um... right?)

I'll leave you with a taste of what I might expect from my mom at this shower, given the following that she wrote for my sister-in-law's shower last September. I think the cast of characters should be fairly evident.

The [my fam] of Milwaukee

Are split in their skills

'Tween those who play music

And those who use drills.

The [mom's side] genes lend credence

To most things mechanic;

While genes from Steve's fam

Makes home projects a panic.

Then along comes Ms. Hillary

Whose background brings mixture.

She can engineer concerts---

And hang your light fixture!

Now dear daughter Wendy <---that's me!

Has caused some to ponder.

With her passion for shopping,

Where DID Fran's genes wander?

But entr'ing stage right, now

Is Hillary the Handy.

A new [my fam] daughter

Who, agreed, is a dandy!

A sister for Wendy,

Fran's tool mate, by gosh---

New daughter for Steve

And a jewel for Josh!

So it seemed most apparent

That the gift with this poem,

For the non-shopper Hillary,

Had to be a gift for the Home-----------------------DEPOT, that is!

Now you can see - I can't help it.

Have you ever been thrown/attended a shower for an out-of-town bride? How was the gift-giving handled?

.... and breaking with it.

2008-07-26T00:19:00.000-04:00

So the ketubah thing. I kept googling "abstract ketubah," and "simple ketubah," and "unusual ketubah," thinking new things would pop up every half hour. They didn't. Imagine that.

There are several ketubah artists who create works inspired by (or even using) Klee and Rothko. Yes, they're beautiful... because Klee's and Rothko's art is beautiful. Why would I want someone else's version of it, and why would I want it covered up with words? If you understand and appreciate this practice, please comment. I just don't get it. To me, it feels like the Picasso print I had on my wall in high school.

But the idea had both of us thinking, apparently. Or at least one of us. Suddenly, while I did yet another mopey-faced search, Tim burst out, "Dude [the closest we get to a pet name]! WHAT ABOUT PAUL???"

Me: Holy sh*t.

Tim: Yeah?

Me: That's amazing!

Tim: Yeah!

We're very verbal.

Delicacy in Everything

ink on canvas

46" x 46"

c. Paul Theriault

"Paul" is our friend and former Jamaica Plain neighbor Paul Theriault. He is, quite simply, the bomb. Paul, his superbly cool and talented wife Jess, and the belly that would soon be (Action) Jackson (no, not really. But Jackson) moved into the first floor apartment of our building, during our last year in Boston. They both work at Brookline Booksmith, which immediately made us love them.

Then we got to know them a little while sitting out on the porch on Halloween, and we loved them even more.

THEN we saw this kind of thing hanging around their house:

Wandering Angus (and detail)

wood panels and acrylic paint

approx. 9' x 16'

c. Paul Theriault

...and it was all about finding a way to get a piece of Paul's incredible work. (We did eventually manage to do that, and I *love* it.) On his website, most of the examples are of his gorgeous textural paintings. The things I really respond to, though, are the gritty and almost primitive sculptures he creates with wood and paint.

South Pacific/Norien

acrylic on canvas and wood and bandsaw blade

6'6" x 3'2"

c. Paul Theriault

We're in the very early stages of planning a ketubah with Paul (like, playing phone tag), but he is so nice and accommodating that I know he'll be amenable to working with our budget. More importantly, I have absolutely no doubt that whatever he creates, we'll both love, and it will be so meaningful to us.

ink on paper and wood with rulers

30" x 28"

c. Paul Theriault

Tim and I are both thinking that it would be great to have something sculptural with the ketubah text integrated into it - maybe having it printed out and then decoupaged onto the wood. Of course, we don't want to break any rules here... just stray from tradition a bit. If you know anything about guidelines for creating a truly legal ketubah, let me know!

Are you having a friend or relative create something unique for your wedding day? Please share!

Tradition......

2008-07-25T19:48:00.000-04:00

Much like our ring experience, I've found ketubah searching with Tim to be a bit difficult. There aren't that many wedding-related things he cares about, but when he does have an opinion about something, it's a strong one. Really. Really. Strong.

(By the way, he just read that over my shoulder... not too happy about it.)

What's funny about this to me is that I'm sure I ultimately care more about these things than he does, but he has such vehement reactions to certain things that I just wouldn't feel comfortable taking the plunge and spending money on them. This is especially true of the ketubah, which is at least somewhat representative of us as a couple.

Also, ketubot (the Hebrew plural) are not cheap. They range from around $100 for a bare-bones design on nice paper to thousands of dollars for gorgeous, completely custom works of art.

Here are some of the ones he found completely offensive, and I don't blame him - they are so not our style:

source 1, source 2

(Doesn't the Torah scroll next to the tree trunk look... well... kind of like a roll of toilet paper?)

Those came from the first page of a 525-hit search, which didn't bode well.

Here are some that I really liked initially, but was ultimately convinced still weren't exactly right:

source 1, source 2

And here's one that we were seriously considering (without having a design around the border), but I was convinced by Amy and my mom that it's too plain for something so celebratory:

source

This one also made the cut, but it felt weird to have an Enso when we're not Japanese - we both love the concept, but it was a cultural appropriation we didn't feel entirely comfortable using:

source

Tim has very minimalist taste, and both of us aren't huge fans of realism or anything frilly. Many ketubot are just overdone, and a lot of the simpler ones we could find simply didn't feel like "us." I wasn't feeling very good about spending upwards of $200 on something that I'd like to hang in our house but didn't love.

Then Tim had an absolutely brilliant idea...

...coming up!

Eeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!

2008-07-23T23:19:00.000-04:00

Our invitations are on their way to Milwaukee, where we'll address and mail them next week! I'll share my own pictures when I get to see them in person, but Stephanie very graciously blogged about them (and linked to my blog :-) ...thanks!). They far exceed my [very high] expectations and are just beautiful, even in 2-D. I am SO excited to see them. And touch them. And MAIL them!

Stephanie's blog post about our gorgeous invitations is here. Make sure to also look at the pictures of her adorable twins, Paxton ("Mr. P") and Avery ("Miss A").

More on Stephanie and her awesomeness soon!

Say bye-bye to wetness!

2008-07-23T22:41:00.000-04:00

... or not. Argh. I waited a few extra hours to blog about my centerpiece mock-up, but some of the stain still hasn't dried because it's so freakin' humid.

what our backyard feels like today. source

All right, little bridesmaidies - no more reading!

But something really cool did happen yesterday. Last week, I posted an Alchemy bid to create an image of allium and fiddleheads that Jes can use on the bridesmaids' shawls & groomsmen's ties, and that we can use on the out-of-town bags. I hadn't budgeted for it, so I set the bid low at $10, hoping that someone might take pity on me and do a quick little sketch that would still look cool once silk-screened. I really had NO idea what's involved in creating an image that can be used as a vector (and still don't), but some of the bids I got were no better than what I could have sketched myself, honestly. I don't mean that as an insult to any Etsians - I think the bid was just awfully low.

Then I got a message from Beth of wildemoon. Would you be willing to go up to $15? Absolutely. I can put it into vector format for Jes so she doesn't have to do it. Awesome! Look at my samples and see what you think. Amazing! I love this one, called "Gray Day":

image by and property of Elizabeth Wilde

Beth was incredible to work with. Every time she e-mailed me, she had a new idea or a new version attached. I gave her several different photos to work from, and then she tweaked the sizes and layout of the stems so they were more comparable in size. She works so fast that the entire process was finished in less than 3 days! Jes is also really happy with the design and has already said she'd love to work with Beth again, which is really exciting to me - I'm so happy that I can claim a little bit of responsibility for artistic matchmaking. :-)

Here's the final product - I'll remind you that I'm a violist and Tim is a percussionist, and the two plants represented are drumstick allium and fiddleheads. Tee hee.

What do you think? Pretty cool, eh? Have you invested in or created a custom graphic for any of your wedding needs?

Veggie patch

2008-07-21T21:27:00.000-04:00

I mentioned the other day how excited (and shocked) I am that my plants are not dead. Woohoo! Well, I have more vegetal excitement today:

These fondant and gumpaste veggies from Angee of wonderworks are true works of art. Seriously, they are amazing... look at the color detail! I honestly think they're my favorite wedding-thing so far. She wrapped them beautifully so they didn't get damaged or melt in shipping, which is amazing for mid-July. Angee even sent two "tasters" (one little piece of fondant, one of gumpaste - Tim and I both like the gumpaste more, to my surprise) so I can hold onto all the veggies as keepsakes. In a combination of excitement, boredom, and a penchant for the absurd, I created this on the kitchen window ledge:

The elephant is a little engagement gift from my mom that I can put rings on when washing dishes... Tim thought the idea of me doing dishes was pretty funny :-P ; the pig is a brass "love pig" my parents gave me on my 13th birthday (I think it's from Scotland, but I can't find anything relevant on the Interwebs); and the rubber animals were used to decorate a present Tim gave me a few years ago. His comment when I made him come into the kitchen to see it: "You're on drugs."

The edible sculptures are also the perfect size to embellish the cupcakes my mom experimented with the other day:

She's freezing them for a few days to see how they hold up (should be fine) - she's coming into town the Monday before our Sunday wedding, and I think we'll probably make the cupcakes Thursday or Friday, depending on how they hold up in her trial run. She's also hunting for more silicone baking cups like the one in the forefront of the picture. Unfortunately, because Crate & Barrel is so good about constantly changing up their inventory, they no longer have the "flower baking cups!" We've checked outlets, eBay, all that, and no luck. But she said she found some cute bundt-like cups at another store, so I think we'll do half-and-half. That'll look pretty freakin' adorable when the veggies/mini cakes are all lined up like a garden patch - some variety will be nice.

source - I fear that if I photograph my own "garden," it will disappear in a puff of smoke.

What do you think of how the cake idea is shaping up? I wish you could taste the beet cake, because I think it could be stuck to the pan and burned and still taste ridiculously good.

Oh, and by the way - I emailed Chrissy with pictures and asked what she thought of my dress issue. She was totally on the page with me, which is great - it's always hard when you have some kind of criticism of an artist's work, but she is so gracious and understanding. I told her that if it's easier, she could send some fabric to me and I could find someone local to take care of it. She thought it was a good idea, so I think I'll go to the woman in Milwaukee my MoH, Melissa, always goes to. I'll update after I'm there next week!

My tomatoes are GROWING!

2008-07-20T00:26:00.000-04:00

Oops, I forgot for a minute that this is a wedding blog. Sorry. BUT humor me for a minute: my tomatoes, strawberries, savory, oregano, parsley, lavender, and even the basil that looked like it had kicked the bucket... they're all thriving! And all I had to do was leave town for three weeks. :-P

So... those pictures I promised. Love the dress; only semi-loving the girl right now. I'm not usually like that, which is why I'm a little bummed. I'm wondering if it would be 1) not too hard and 2) more flattering to make it strapless, but I think the fabric probably isn't rigid enough to support my puppies... er, dogs. St. Bernards. But maybe a bra could be built in. Any thoughts? Leave it as it is and do some serious weightlifting? I definitely need a better bra than the one I'm wearing in the pictures, that much is certain. And the necklace is looking kind of funny - I'm going to be wearing a longer one with a pendant.

I kind of wish I had taken pictures of the back before I took it away from Chrissy's, since I couldn't really see how it's cut there. I would have liked for it to be pretty much straight up and down, rather than curving in near the shoulders. I'm going to have some kind of wrap, but I'd rather not need to wear it. The thing is, I'm not really sure what could be done to fix the shoulders. I guess she could add some of the same red edging that's around the neckline. Thoughts?

In any event, the Seattle trip was a lot of fun, albeit exhausting. The biggest day involved two trips to Chrissy's (she is, in a word, amazing... I can't really begin to describe how easy and great she is to work with), one LONG wander-fest through Pike Place Market (with a detour to Nordstrom Rack - didn't buy anything!), and a leisurely & delicious dinner at Ray's with my mom.

PP Market is one of the most incredible and overwhelming places I've visited in a long time. I don't usually do well in crowds, so it was a little intimidating for me. But after braving multiple street markets in Hong Kong a few months ago, this one actually felt downright spacious. Here are a few more pictures from that visit - pretty soon, they'll turn into something wedding-related! I'm aware it's moderately strange that I'm more excited about produce than my dress (to the point of posting three times more veggie p*rn than dress porn), but I know some of you will relate. :-) I'm also pretty happy with how these photos turned out, just taken with a little Kodak EasyShare! I did some very minor editing in Goldberg (including cropping the datestamp, which I brilliantly forgot to turn off). Most of the thanks is due to the cute signs and my new friend Butch (last picture), who kindly let me snap away for about 15 minutes. Butch rules.

Have you traveled far and wide for your dress, or made a big purchase on a leap of faith? I'm feeling a little silly that I took such a huge trip and am not totally in love with how I look in the dress. Please give me some thoughts and advice!

Guilty guilted me into it.

2008-07-17T13:30:00.000-04:00

Just kidding, Guilty Secret! But I definitely should never make promises I'm not sure I can make good on in a timely fashion.

My mom and I are getting ready to leave our hotel, and I have a long day of traveling ahead of me (through Milwaukee with a layover, then back to Boston and driving to Gabby and co.'s house to stay the night). So I'm going to post ONE more round of teasers before starting a full, only-a-few-holds-barred rundown of the Seattle trip.

I'm not feeling terribly body-happy these last few days, so I'm going to post a few pics of the full dress hanging by itself before posting the pics of me in it. I know it's sort of silly, but it's less scary for me that way. I also took over 100 pictures at Pike Place Market that I'm trying to figure out how to incorporate into the wedding...

See you when I'm back in EDT!

I just watched a very long All-Star game...

2008-07-16T02:41:00.000-04:00

...and my eyes are crossing because I was glued to the TV for so long. But I wanted to post a smattering of quick peeks at my Tuesday, with more to come tomorrow night!

No, I didn't climb it.

Westward, ho! (Hey, don't call me that.)

2008-07-15T02:10:00.000-04:00

Along a moving walkway at SeaTac airport. Besides just being rad, it reminds me of this,

which I keep in my viola case as a little "Tim" memento.

My mom and I just flew to Seattle on a frequent-flyer-mile-enabled trip to have my dress fitting with Chrissy Wai-Ching! I am beyond excited. After waking up at noon on Sunday (ah, the life of a musician), I went back to Boston for a day, hung out with my friends Andrea and Glenda, tried to sleep, couldn't, and flew out at 6:30 Monday morning. I crashed this afternoon for a couple hours but am still so antsy that I can barely sit still, much less get ready for bed. Let's count: That means I've been up for nearly 39 hours, not counting today's nap. Yee haw!

Here's a little peek at what we're up to, since I just can't wait to share these pics... especially the last one:

Safeco and Qwest Fields, as seen from the highway. (I took this picture while my mom was driving 65mph, thankyouverymuch.) I am so jealous that Seattle has two stadiums right next to each other, within walking distance of lots of cool downtown stuff.

My old friend Sarah grew up in Seattle and had some recommendations of great places to eat. She knows me so well. :-) I think we'll go here for lunch on Tuesday:

Cafe Flora. source

Doesn't that look amazing?? Farm-to-table, community-minded restaurant with food that sounds freakin' delicious.

Tomorrow morning we're going to hit Pike Place Market for a few hours, then go on a Sephora expedition to find some super-sweatproof makeup. There's no major makeup counter or store even remotely close to Ithaca, and this is a chance to go when I don't have too much other stuff going on. My mom hates shopping with such unbridled fervor that I may drop her off at a coffee shop and tiptoe among the [tu]lip(stick)s alone. (Just humor me. It's a family curse, and I've been with my mom for 12+ hours straight. I can't help it.)

Pitter patter pitter patter. source

And finally, the teaser I'm so excited about... thanks for bringing it with you, Mom!!!

To be continued...

Again with the late night posts...

2008-07-12T01:51:00.000-04:00

Last week, I made a draft of a post when I wasn't able to be online for very long. I just finished it, but unfortunately it's posted on July 4th. If you're not getting the feed through Google Reader, please read this post! Thanks and sorry for the technical difficulties - we now resume our regularly scheduled sleeping.

zzzzzzzzzz

source

The favor of your favor, part 2

2008-07-11T15:20:00.000-04:00

Somewhat gratuitous. But... Best. Logo. Ever. Source

After I wrote about favors last night, my mission was to find some cute baseball-themed favors this afternoon. I think I scored a home run! (Ha.)

source

Cooperstown Cookie Company, based in none other than Cooperstown, NY (home to the no-adjectives-do-it-justice Hall of Fame that Tim visited after his Cornell interview), seems like a wonderful, family-run (woman-owned!) company. Besides having adorable products that look delicious, my favorite thing about them so far is their commitment to the Cooperstown community. Because it's a New York State company, I feel like that qualifies as fairly local, especially when I compare it to the distances some other favors might have had to travel. The lanterns I ordered for the centerpieces came from China by way of California, and I'm trying to assuage my guilt by never doing that again. :-(

The shortbread cookies come in the above four flavors: Classic Baseball Shortbread, Mudville Mudball Chocolate Chip, Boys of Summer Lemon, and All-Star Almond. Cute, right? And because I'm a butter fiend, shortbread is my friend. Yum. Also, I really had my heart set on the "midnight snack" idea that's becoming popular, because people are always hungry again after they've been dancing. (Tim said, "But don't we have to be out of the Fontainebleau by 11?" Thank you, Captain Literal.) A snack AND a favor might break the bank, but if we have the favors at the door as people are leaving, with some chilled single-serving milk cartons, I say that just about covers all my bases! Oooh, I'd better post this before I make any more bad puns.

For Gabby's benefit. source

The cookie idea also ties in with my guestbook idea: vintage wood baseball bats that guests can sign with permanent pens. I've been looking for small ways to incorporate our mutual love of baseball, and I think I might have succeeded!

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Do you have any semi-random ideas you're trying to make relevant to the "vibe" of your wedding?

The favor of your favor

2008-07-11T02:41:00.001-04:00

Way back when I was starting to gather inspiration photos, this was one of my favorites:

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Before I honed in on the farmers' market theme, I was thinking rustic elegance (which the farmers' market thing still fits into, I hope), and these seedlings seemed like perfect favors. But there were a few problems.

I've read that they're hard to get to grow, which would be compounded by the fact that our wedding is at the end of October - the tail end of when you're supposed to plant seedlings in cold zones.
They're kind of pricey (ranging from $3-$6 apiece, depending on the supplier and the packaging).
Most of our guests are from out of town, so they'd have to be in sturdy enough packaging for them to transport home. Even with plastic tubing, the reality is that a lot of people might leave them behind or - gasp - throw them away. Sort of defeats the purpose of having an ecologically friendly favor, no?

The most ecologically friendly favor, of course, would be either no favor at all or carbon offsets through a site like TerraPass or NativeEnergy. I would really like to give guests something tangible, though... most of them are traveling a really long way for this wedding, and it's one small token of thanks. My mom's latest idea was jars of apple butter or apple jelly (purchased from an Ithaca Market vendor), personalized with our own label. I'm hoping to use the graphic that the fabulous Stephanie of Stelie Designs created.

These favors would be cute and useful, but not especially original: I already know that our friends who are getting married in September are giving out jars of something his mom is making. I'm slightly worried that it seems copycat-y (I know my friend wouldn't be mad, but I'm sure I'd get a little friendly ribbing from her and some of the many crossover guests); more than that, though, I would love to come up with something slightly more unique that's still equally useable. I've thought about a similar favor with Mike Graney's JP Honey, a nod to the awesome Boston neighborhood we lived in for five years.

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The other option I've thought about a lot but can't get anywhere with: something baseball-themed that's not a tchotchke and might have something to do with the Red Sox-Yankees rivalry. (I'm a Milwaukee Brewers fan by birth, but the Sox are my adopted American League team. Tim is a diehard Evil Empire fan.) Please let me know if you have any clever ideas - I'd love to hear them!

Are you giving away favors? Are you more concerned with making them personal, or making them useful?

Raw goodness

2008-07-10T14:04:00.000-04:00

I mentioned a while b ac k that there were very few rings that Tim and I were able to agree upon. When we'd look at jewelry, it seemed that he despised anything traditional, and he wasn't a fan of diamonds for cultural and ethical reasons (the deBeers thing). I understand and respect that, but I'll admit I still had a hankering for something sparkly, even though I did want something different from a traditional solitaire. (The main reason I couldn't deal with a solitaire is that I am a complete and utter klutz, and I have visions of knocking the whole bauble off the band. Believe me, I could do it.)

That ring is real.

When we discovered Todd Reed's work (over a year before we chose my ring), we knew it was perfect. He works with both raw and polished diamonds, which we'd never seen before, and uses recycled gold and ethical/eco-friendly stones. Nothing even came close to having the same impact on both of us, and the nature of his work is such that even the cut diamonds have a more natural feel than they often do... I might even be able to get that little bit of bling I wanted! It seemed like we might be able to agree on something (imagine that...). So, true to form, I became obsessed with his website. Er... stalked it.

Some of my favorites from his full collection:

two bracelets

earrings, cufflinks

brooch, necklace

And my favorite rings (not necessarily for engagement rings or for myself - just purdy):

The three shown above are actually all men's rings, which I didn't know when I was seriously considering the last one! Oh well - I still love it.

I love mixed metals and really wanted to figure out how to incorporate white metal into my engagement ring, but I think his designs look best in yellow gold, and I also couldn't find a design I loved that would work with that idea. I was planning to get a plain white gold wedding band so the ring would look like the first men's ring above, but my plan changed when something happened - I'll fill you in on that soon, I promise. Strangely, though, after wearing lots of silver for my entire life, transitioning to yellow has been remarkably easy. I think it looks a lot better on me.

This is the design we ended up going with. I love its simplicity and strength - but it's still somewhat thin enough to look relatively delicate on my hand. I was able to specify that I wanted the raw stones to be as varied as possible, since they range in color from whites to yellows to reds to browns to grays. I also had one very small princess cut diamond put in there, which adds just a little bit of sparkle. It's 18K gold, which has a really deep, amazing glow. The two things I love most about the ring is that glint from the cut stone, and that the raw stones look completely different depending on the light - it's like I have three different rings! Also, I'll blog soon about my surprise wedding band, and Tim's awesome ring.

Here's my Todd Reed ring, in all its blurry-pic splendor:

I really wanted Tim to love my ring, too. I know not everyone feels that way, but it was our first major purchase together (albeit with HIS money), and it's something I hope we'll both be looking at and enjoying for a long time.

If you have a ring, was it important to you that your fiance(e) like it as much as you? Did s/he give you free reign over the choice? Or did s/he pick it out for you?

All Todd Reed pictures property of the artist and from here.

Todayyyyyy is for Aaaaaa-myyyyyyy***

2008-07-09T22:45:00.000-04:00

***from this hilarious song [lyrics; video] that has nothing to do with Amy except 1) wedding and 2) name.

A little over a month ago (I can't believe it's only been a month!), I started a new relationship. While Tim was gone. With someone I met online.

Her name is Amy, and I met her through the message boards on Weddingbee!

Rehearsal dinner thirst

Without ever having met in person, we've started an e-mail discourse that has taken us from talking about Cornell (her alma mater), to weddings, to gardening, to weddings, to family drama, to (yup) weddings, to Etsy, to relationships, to clothes... and to many things NOT wedding. I think Amy is a kindred spirit, and I feel really lucky to have "met" someone so similar to me who lives all the way across the country in Eugene, OR. I was terrible at keeping pen pals when I was a kid, so now's my chance!

Amy and Andy got married on June 22, at a Christmas tree farm near Eugene. Even before I saw all her AMAZING pictures, I knew that we share really similar approaches to our planning and aesthetic (and I also knew I'd be stealing--er, borrowing--a lot from her). We had even already independently planned some of the same minutiae! She DIY'd a ton of stuff and just generally had really, really beautiful details that made the wedding both simple (in the best possible sense of the word... like, un-fussy) and stunning. She used the rustic nature of the farm and surroundings to full advantage: they had perfect weather for their outdoor ceremony and reception, and from the looks of the pictures, the guests were all thrilled to be there. Take this:

Some of A & A's friends - this series is dubbed "the hills are alive" on their Flickr page.

Their colors were all shades of blue with white, which worked so well in the surroundings: the flowers looked very loose and unstructured and fit the vibe of the place, but the colors still stood out against all the lush green.

I think the pictures pretty much speak for themselves. These are just a few of the 800 or so non-pro pics that Amy and Andy's friends have uploaded on Flickr - I think they were pretty pumped, no?

So without further ado...

The details:

Zee keck. There was some minor drama surrounding it, but Amy says it turned out delicious despite some aesthetic issues. Looks mighty yummy to me (and purty)...

I think the effort put into this detail is AWESOME, whether it's by Amy or the venue.

escort card display

The dapper Oliver J. Dogg. He wasn't the ring bearer but a supremely honored guest.

Beautiful ketubah from ketubahketubah.com. I really love that this is displayed for everyone to look at, since not everyone has had a chance to see a Jewish marriage contract before.

How in love am I with this boutonniere?!? Green blueberries!

Amy's Twigs & Honey hairpiece - she scored one of the few that Myra makes for Oregon boutiques!

Kippot, programs, and water bottles for the guests

The ceremony:

The setup, pre-ceremony; Amy and her parents walking down the aisle

Andy's dad is an established composer who wrote all the music for their ceremony. SO amazing!! It was played by University of Oregon graduate students.

The chuppah carriers lead the way. A & A made the chuppah with birch poles from Nettleton Hollow and a tallis of Andy's.

I love these pictures.

The reception:

Table details: gorgeous flowers in galvanized pails and votives in jelly jars enhance the rustic feel. The table numbers are adorable AND easy to read!

Amy says that she can't wait to get the pro pics back if only for the detail shots of the flowers, and that she basically tears up when she thinks about how perfect they were. In addition to the green blueberries (greenberries?) in the boutonnieres, her bouquet and the centerpieces also had baby green apples and pears. She loved her bouquet so much that she carried it around all night - even when people kept offering to put it somewhere for her! :-)

Cake-cutting is serious business. (I think this is one of the only pictures in which Amy isn't smiling!)

I can just tell from the pictures that this band rules - everyone was dancing up a storm! These pictures even make me want to dance at our wedding...

One of the best-known and -loved Jewish wedding traditions: the Hora (handkerchief dance)!

On the day of their wedding, the Jewish couple is to be treated like royalty. They sit in chairs while guests try to outdo each other entertaining them... hence the break-dancing. :-)

This pretty much says it all.

Congratulations, Amy and Andy - I wish you guys all the best. And thanks for providing so much great inspiration for our wedding! Amy, I'm thrilled that we've become friends, and I can't wait to meet you guys in person!!

Back tonight...

2008-07-09T17:45:00.000-04:00

...with a vengeance. (I'm hoping to have several HOURS of internet access after 10 PM.)

If you check back 'round midnight EDT, [I hope] you won't be sorry... and if for some reason I fail to get connected, well, I'll just tell you that I'm a lot more bummed about it than you are.

A yummy taste of what's to come!

Pho, Licks, and Salon Gabby

2008-07-07T01:19:00.000-04:00

We had a really wonderful time in Portland hanging out with Hillary and her family - the weather was fantastic, and the company was even better. It was a lot of fun being there after all the rehearsals and concerts were over, and things were better with Tim once I didn't have that stuff to think about.

After that, we were in Boston for a couple days, staying with our friend/bridesmaid Gabby. We went out with groomsman Vic and his girlfriend, Liz - ate at Le's (formerly Pho Pasteur), where we used to get takeout pho at least once a week. We now talk at least once a week about how much we miss it. Ain't no pho in Ithaca.

HELLS yeah! But no cilantro, please. (I know, I know... I wish it tasted good to me.)

Since we were still hungry (yeah, right), we went to J.P. Licks. Yum. Tim got his old standby - Kahlua ice cream with peanut butter cup topping. Gabby and I cracked up when we saw the expression on his face upon looking at his dish: pure, unadulterated joy. Gabby said she has never seen him look that happy. Let's see if we can reproduce that look on our wedding day. :-)

The J.P. mothership source
The night Tim left, Gabby and I had total sleepover fun. First she straightened my hair (which usually doesn't look good but for some reason did that night):
Then she curled it - the inspiration was these pictures (please tell me if you know the sources!!):
...but it ended up looking kinda like my hair normally does (sorry Gab):
mmm, sweaty.
And then I played with makeup:

Of course, this all has special significance these days. I tried to get a little "bridal" with the makeup and succeeded in making my eyelids look ashy and unblended. Wow, I hope I don't do that all the time. I didn't apply any foundation or concealer - this was just to try out colors, not to get an actual "look."
I like the lipstick but might want something with a little more pink/berry (mmm... Pinkberry), and I'm never sure if I'm putting on too much blush. Here's a picture with a little more blush... but it still doesn't look like enough. In the mirror I looked like Raggedy Ann!
I'd like to do my own makeup because 1) I know what I like, 2) I'm pretty good at it (above eyeshadow job being the notable exception), and 3) I just can't justify spending all that money when I don't even get to keep the products! I'm going to go to Sephora next week and scope out primers and Make Up For Ever. Anyone have reviews of similar products they'd like to share? Are you doing your own makeup, or at least shopping for products first?

We interrupt this program

2008-07-04T15:36:00.001-04:00

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I think we're going to go in the "maximized program" direction a la Miss Cream Puff (except without sewing, as hilarity and subsequent tears would be inevitable), because there are many little things I'd like to explain about the wedding. I feel like the program is a way to do that somewhat concisely, without getting didactic in the ceremony.

Among them:

Jewish customs and traditions
readings/poems that won't make it into the ceremony but are nonetheless special to us
the point of the allium and fiddleheads, which will be screened onto ties and shawls for the wedding party
remembrances of my grandparents, and perhaps short explanations of how they're incorporated
the usual info about wedding party, etc.
and this...

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Well, not that picture. But I would like to say something about marriage equality, as this is a very important topic to both of us. We lived in Boston at the time of the Goodridge decision (actually the same neighborhood the Goodridge family was from), and we're proud to have been so close to such a major part of history for gay rights in the US.

The subject is definitely important enough to me to incorporate it into the ceremony text, but I wonder if it might be better to put it in the program where people might look at it later and give it more thought. Also, although I do have major problems with the idea that some of my friends (unlikely) or my parents' friends (maybe more likely) don't feel the same way we do, I certainly don't want to alienate them by making the ceremony a political forum. That was always a really frustrating thing for me at Ob erlin's Jewish events: somehow, the very socially and politically active student body managed to make Shabbat about women's rights and the plight of the homeless. I'm equally concerned about these matters, but despite that, it wasn't the appropriate place.

Most Jewish events at my alma mater source

Perhaps we could put it into our vows, though. Do you have any ideas of how to do this elegantly?

These issues aside, I'm still not sure about a much less heavy thing: what I want our programs to look like. The photo at the top has been my inspiration for a while, but I'm not sure how much paper will fit into it. As you've likely figured out by now, I can go a little overboard with the words. These gorgeous books from Etsy's Littleput Books have the same problem. But they sure are pretty... maybe it's just that the ribbons match our colors *exactly*:

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How can I create something with my rudimentary crafting skills that would support several pages (maybe brown kraft paper?) and incorporate a pretty colored ribbon? What about a grommet at the top with a ribbon holding the pages together? Please help a girl out!

Independence

2008-07-04T00:07:00.001-04:00

First off, I'm sorry for the light posting this week. We're in Maine right now, where I just played what might have been my last-ever concert with the Portland Symphony Orchestra.

It feels a little weird that the last tune we played was "Stars and Stripes Forever," but oh well.

Watch this video of the Boston Pops' version, and make sure to note how drunk the entire audience is: http:/youtube.com/watch ?v=p3lGr6Cx6pQ&feature=related

Anyway, we're staying at our bridesmaid Hillary (aka Coach Z)'s mom's house, where we're spending the 4th. I'll have lots to blog about come Saturday, I'm sure.

Happy long weekend, everyone!

Picture-less post

2008-07-01T02:51:00.000-04:00

Tim is sleeping next to me somewhat peacefully right now, and my brain is going into overdrive.

Since Tim returned from Ghana (two weeks ago), things have been pretty tense. We've been arguing a lot, spending more time on our computers than usual, and just generally not getting along. I know that part of the problem is the letdown he's feeling after a big, amazing trip, but there's more to it than that.

He doesn't want to have a wedding.

Now, I didn't say he doesn't want to get married--it isn't that dire--and he also hasn't said outright that this is how he feels. But the Google reader, the indiebride, the wedding-related shopping, the overheard phone calls with my mom and my MOH, and yes, the blogging--they're all driving him nuts, not to mention the wacked-out sleep schedule (3AM to noon) I've been on since the beginning of June.

When we started talking more concretely about getting married, we had "the talk" about the wedding. Tim isn't in touch with his family (a long, sad series of events that have left him scarred but better off), and he doesn't have a lot of close friends. He's painfully, painfully shy. I'm sympathetic to these things and try to be understanding, but it sometimes becomes exhausting. I'm not saying that it's right for me to be exhausted by it - it's just reality.

I, on the other hand, have a small but close-knit family and many, many friends I consider close. I want them to be there. I've never been an envision-my-wedding kind of girl, but I've always known I wanted to have one. I assumed until fairly recently that I'd get married in Milwaukee (where I grew up), with 200+ of mostly-my-parents' friends, in a synagogue.

All three of those things were understandably difficult for Tim: a Milwaukee wedding would seem "mine" rather than "ours," and it had the potential to highlight the absence of his family; his shyness means that crowds (especially ones filled with a lot of strangers) are petrifying; and since he's atheist, a synagogue isn't exactly the most comfortable place for him. He knew that it's important to my family and me to be married by a rabbi, though, and that part of it was not as alarming as a rabbi and a synagogue.

The move to Ithaca changed my mind about location. I fell in love with Ithaca life immediately and could easily picture getting married there. I started to think about it more seriously and realized that if we chose to marry in Ithaca, a lot of my parents' friends would elect to stay home, making the guest list more manageable and intimate. I casually mentioned it to Tim a few times, and he seemed to warm up to the idea. Problems 1 and 2, gone.

I'm not sure if I mentioned yet that we started planning our wedding before there was a ring on my finger, which was a little awkward but ultimately fine with me - after all, the pipe dream of getting married was becoming reality, and that's what mattered! We agreed to have a rabbi and found a beautiful venue where we could have both ceremony and reception. Problem 3, check.

But as planning quickly heated up, I realized that Tim was just not into it. In fact, it's starting to feel like he doesn't want to hear about ANY of it, even the things (music, food) he'd normally care about. My summer schedule is allowing me to sleep, relax, and read all the Weddingbee I want to - and I feel fine with that. He seems to think my lazy days are emblematic of a bigger problem, though, and it's starting to frustrate me. I'm fine! I just want to look at fonts! I've tried to impose computer time limits for myself, get out of the house together and take walks or go places, and spend more time cooking or watching movies together.

He does have his assigned projects, but he hasn't had to start those yet. I'm not worried about his finishing them... it's just that I want him to nod and smile when I say something about embroidered handkerchiefs, rather than make snide comments about them.

I know many (most?) brides put up with apathetic fiances. But actively hostile? That seems to be a more serious issue.

If your partner isn't actively involved in the planning process, is s/he supportive of your excitement? Or is it excruciatingly difficult to get any sign of interest? Aside from having more late-night cryfests, how can I work on this?

Auspicious giglet

2008-06-28T19:18:00.000-04:00

I just played a wedding gig - a very, very, VERY short ceremony at our venue, the Fontainebleau! Yep, I got to spy a little bit.

Since the ceremony was in Lawrence Chapel (on the grounds but a short walk away from the Inn) and we weren't hired to do the cocktail hour, I was sad I wouldn't have a chance to see the Inn "in action." But we got there a little early, and I walked around near the chapel to take a few pictures.

Post-ceremony: guests walking from Lawrence Chapel to the Inn.

As it happens, we're not using the chapel for our ceremony - there's no iconography or anything in there, but it's still a little too church-like for us (and probably our rabbi, too!). Our ceremony will be held on the tented patio at the Inn itself. The chapel is beautiful and simple, though, and these pictures give you a little sense of what the grounds feel like.

The back of the Inn, facing Cayuta Lake. source

Our ceremony will be in the area on the right, but in an enclosed tent.

Here's the front of the chapel and a glimpse of the inside (I felt a little weird taking non-pro pics in there); the couple set out a basket of programs and cute wooden fans... it was SO hot!

There's a beautiful cemetery that belonged to the original owners of the home, the Lawrence family - it dates back about 200 years. At the entrance, I found several patches of wild strawberries!

After the ceremony, we drove past the main building, where I saw Kate from Word of Mouth (our caterers too!) grilling outside. I hopped out of the car to say hi, and she took me in for a quick glance at what the inside looked like "all done up." She also gave me a few tips on centerpieces, since she thought the centerpieces at this wedding were a little too big. Looks like I made a good choice going with the narrower boxes (even though I was just being cheap). :-D

Tina and Katie: small on web presence, big on talent. source

I can't wait to see the Fontainebleau in the fall, since I've now visited in the three other seasons! I think the trees will be absolutely stunning. As a matter of fact...

The lake view from the Fontainebleau, 53 weeks prior to our wedding!

Have you had a chance to see your venue "in action," or will your wedding day be the first time?

To quote Tessie...

2008-06-28T01:17:00.000-04:00

"Oh my goodness oh my goodness oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!!"

("Pipe down, all of you.

Do you want Hannigan to hear you?")

quote source

poster source

I just got very excited.

Thanks to Suzanne at RedKite, I was directed to cakecentral.com for ideas and inspiration. I started browsing through their extensive photo gallery and came first upon this:

source

Then this:

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And then...

wait for it....

ta dah!!!!!

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Notice anything? Like, that it's almost exactly the same as my inspiration photo... but a smidge different?

That's because the woman who baked these cupcakes got the recipe from Woman's Day magazine - they're from Karen Tack and Alan Richardson's collection of amazing recipes.

I actually looked at Hello Cupcake at a bookstore a few weeks ago and didn't see this recipe - either it's not included in the book, or I missed it in my haste to look through every cupcake book on the shelf. (There were a lot.)

Now for the bad (perhaps just... odd) news. Here are some of the key ingredients. Remember - chocolate cupcakes.

1 stick mint chewing gum

9 green fruit chews (Jolly Rancher)

1 vanilla fruit chew (Tootsie Roll Midgee, AirHeads)

4 red fruit chews (Jolly Rancher)

8 orange fruit chews (Starburst)

Green apple and watermelon AirHeads

Yeah.......... I think I might, um, stay with the original plan. Does your gut - so to speak - tell you anything about this project?

Inside the box

2008-06-27T08:13:00.000-04:00

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This centerpiece inspiration from The Knot was similar to the cupcake decorations in that oh-my-goodness-how-could-my-wedding-exist-without-this? kind of way. Like the cupcake-veggies, I have searched high and low for shallow wood boxes like the inspiration photo. (The father and the groom of that bride made the boxes from scratch - lucky girl!) I love how understated they are, with the lantern giving it a little bit of height. I was thinking about 12"x12" would be great, though I don't really care if it's perfectly square, and I'll put 3 jelly jar votives on each table. The chalkboard table "numbers" will either lean on the corner of the box or get some height with a small dowel rod - I'm thinking that might be better, since the centerpieces are so low. I just don't want to commit the age-old sin of blocking guests' views of each other... I was at a wedding recently at which guests were taking the stunning but giant centerpieces off the tables! No, they weren't as big as this:

No thanks! Source

One of the first promising finds I found (through Elizabeth Anne Designs!) was this BJURON "plant pot" from Ikea. The wood is pretty, and it has a galvanized bottom that makes it great for... well... plants. But it's taller and deeper than the inspiration, and the dimension options are approximately 6" x 6", 8" x 8", or 9.5" x 5". If it were either shallower *or* bigger, I might be happy with it, but it's just not the right feel.

source

Then I found several things like this terra cotta plate. Terra cotta is also great for live plants, so they had that going for them. The color, though, could be kind of obtrusive with the purple/dark red/teal color scheme. I thought about painting them, but since they still were neither the shape nor the material I wanted, I kept looking.

source

In my head, I had already ruled out Jamali Garden because of price or shipping distance, but it turns out I was totally wrong. Not only do they ship from NYC (4 hours from me - not too bad), their prices are actually pretty reasonable, especially for these wood trays that can be re-used by us and by guests. The wood is less distressed than I would have liked, but I think that makes them more usable in the future.

source

I decided against the version that actually is 12" x 12" (my hoped-for dimensions - this one is 11" x 8") and has a galvanized liner, because it's twice as expensive. I know this choice limits my options as far as what to fill the tray with, but honestly, I'm sort of glad not to have to worry about growing stuff for the centerpieces given my black thumb. I'll fill them with different varieties of moss that comes pre-packaged, and that can all be assembled the week before the wedding. I'll probably stick a few flowers in there for color (with a little foam), some rocks, and/or a few pieces of fruit or veggies. When I'm home from my travels next month, I hope the trays will have arrived so I can do some mock-ups.

What do you think? Any other ideas for low-maintenance, rustic fill, or for a way to create some textural variety with different mosses/similar materials?

These are the lanterns I purchased from eBay seller K&R Gifts. I was thrilled with how meticulously they were packaged and how quickly they arrived, in perfect condition. I decided against the teal version because, even though it's so pretty and is in our color scheme, I thought the light from these would be a little nicer. I might buy a few of the teal ones to hang from shepherd's hooks near the ceremony tent.

I also purchased long-lasting, cleaner-burning soy tealights from Etsy seller Worthy Soy Candles (who only lives 80 minutes from me!), although I'm still thinking about going with LED votives for safety reasons. The candles are SO great and burn for such a long time that I'd be more than happy to have 100 for personal use were I to go with the LEDs.

Have you "cheated" on any of your original grand plans by taking an easier route? Do you deem yourself guilty or not guilty? (For the record, I plead not guilty. Anything that makes it easier/lower-maintenance but equally attractive is legal in my book!)

Beet it

2008-06-26T06:36:00.000-04:00

After I wrote about the cake decoration issue the other day, I was inundated with responses to my Alchemy bid. OK, not inundated, maybe, but I did get at least eight responses. I thought that was pretty awesome!

The two that piqued my interest the most were wonderworks and BCDGifts. wonderworks' shop is all polymer clay miniatures that are colorful, detailed, and adorable. She wrote and said she could make the veggies I want out of gumpaste, which I know would be easy to mail, take color well, and last a few days without compromising its [somewhat marginal because gumpaste just is] taste. She assured me she could imitate with gumpaste anything she does with clay.

Adorable, right? The detail is amazing. source

BCDGifts' shop, on the other hand, is part crafts and part food. Most of the food work she does is chocolate, both milk/dark (normal brown color) and dyed white (bright colors). These would also last several days without worrying about taste, and it'll be cooler so we likely won't have to worry about melting.

source

I'm not sure, though, which will complement Grandpa's beet cake more successfully. Even though I am a chocolate fiend and would certainly love the taste of it more, I wonder whether it would be overkill atop a beet cake cupcake. However, why should I compromise the taste?

Should I spend money to order samples from both sellers, or do you have an experience with either of these materials that would help me decide? Or since I'm sure some of you have already made the recipe :-) ...which do you think would taste better with beet cake?

Is it because I ate too close to bedtime?

2008-06-25T11:59:00.000-04:00

Last night I dreamed that it was the day before the wedding and I hadn't chosen the music. For me, this qualifies as a nightmare. The (now) funniest part of it is that one of my bridesmaids, Gabby, was trying to convince me to use all sorts of music that was completely the opposite of what I want, and would have made Tim barf.

Not exactly what Gabby was suggesting, but close.

source

I'll (grudgingly) admit it: we're music snobs. I'm terrified of the music I choose for our wedding saying something about me that isn't accurate. As performers, we both play a lot of new music, but I don't want to alienate our guests by choosing music that's hard to understand/enjoy on a first listening.* Tim, on the other hand, couldn't care less about alienating people... he thinks it would be funny. In fact, it's a running joke--rooted in reality, I'm afraid to say--that he wants our friend James to play at the wedding.

I adore James, and the theremin is awesome. However.

source

It's the understatement of the century to say that we're incredibly lucky to have the Jupiter Quartet playing in our wedding. I mentioned Meg & Dan recently - they are a badass violinist and cellist, respectively, who play in one of the best young professional string quartets in the world. The violist is Meg's sister and my close friend Liz, and the first violinist is our good friend Nelson. The personal dynamic of the group is amazing. Playing in a quartet is often likened to being married to three other people (legally!), and somehow they make it work with one pair actually married to each other and another pair being siblings and best friends. Not only do they make it work (Tim Gunn-style) - they sound phenomenal.

They don't look bad, either. Here are the Jupiters caught in a rare moment of seriousness, though it does appear they're on the verge of laughter. source They usually look more like this.

The Quartet has an extremely demanding international tour schedule. As it happens, they're also playing at our very good friend Rebecca's wedding in September, and she went so far as to plan her wedding date around their schedule. I didn't think that far ahead! But I was on pins and needles while they waited to hear from their manager whether they'd be out of town for our wedding. I was ecstatic when I ran into them last month and they told me it was all good!

Some of the composers I've considered so far are Bartok, Britten, Debussy, Ives, and Ravel. I love their music and they all have string quartets, but I'm not sure it's appropriate for a wedding - even one with a less-than-traditional bride and groom.

What makes this less than traditional is that sadly, before our engagement pictures, almost all our photos together looked like this.

Do the two of you have differences in opinion over what music is appropriate for your wedding? Are you as petrified as I am about making the wrong choice?

*This kind of music is my favorite because it's thought-provoking and often (I hope) makes people want to hear it again, but guests at the wedding might not be inclined to take their program home and go buy a CD!

Cake quandary

2008-06-24T23:18:00.000-04:00

Even before the market theme came to fruition (holy crap! I didn't even realize it was a pun until I proofread), one of my favorite ideas was to use my grandpa's chocolate beet cake recipe for our wedding cake.

That's right, everyone. Beets. I read somewhere that your wedding cake should be the best cake you've ever eaten, and this cake* takes the... well, you know. My grandpa has been making it for as long as I can remember, and it's the stuff of legend. And many a weekend breakfast at our family's house, I'm embarrassed to say.

I gave the recipe to our caterer soon after we booked them, because I mentioned it at our first meeting and they were very intrigued. They were even more excited when they found out it uses canned beets rather than fresh ones, significantly lowering the mess factor. My first thought was to make mini bundt cakes - my grandpa always makes the cake in a bundt pan.

source

But my life changed - seriously - when I found a certain picture, whose source I cannot find for the LIFE of me. I have become obsessed.

With some brides, it's the Badgley Mischka dress. Others, the perfect pink peony. But me? For me, it's all about chocolate and mini shovels:

Is that not THE most perfect thing you could imagine for this wedding? I want to lick the screen every time I look at the picture.

I really do have that impulse. What kind of deficiency is that?

A few things are complicating my mission, though. Our caterers are understandably wary of doing the vegetables because they'd be a totally time-consuming labor of love. I'd be happy to find another baker to do it, but there aren't that many options around here: one only decorates with fresh flowers, one is horrendously expensive, several won't use a family recipe - you get the picture.

I wrote to Keavy from the fabulous Kumquat Cupcakery in Brooklyn, and she said she'd be happy to do it (and I think she'd do an amazing job), but with that option, one of our friends would have to drive them all the way from NYC. Stressful for everyone involved. I'm thinking of branching out to bakers in the Syracuse, Binghamton, and Rochester areas, but what I'd really like to do is have our caterers make the cupcakes or mini bundts and have someone else make the veggies - it would be so much less expensive! (I've looked online to purchase them, but the only things I can find are made of marzipan, which isn't my favorite.) I posted an Etsy Alchemy request and hope to hear something soon. Etsy don't fail me now...

Keavy's gorgeous creations. source

How far should I take this before I give up on it? Do you have one inspiration photo you've found, or one idea you've had, that you just can't let go of?

*Not my grandpa's recipe... that just wouldn't be fair. But it's close.

Grandparentage

2008-06-24T10:20:00.000-04:00

My dad's mom, or "Gram," as my brother and I called her, passed away when I was 21. We had always been very close, and I went to visit her in San Diego every year in addition to her treks to the Midwest to see us. I have wonderful memories of my San Diego vacations and of my time with Gram, and it was really, really hard for me when she died - especially because I was just finishing the school year and couldn't be out in CA with my parents.

One of our yearly San Diego adventures - the San Diego Zoo and Wild Animal Park! source

She and I had a lot in common - loves of reading, arguing, politics, Brahms, and Scrabble. Ohhhh the Scrabble games - she taught me a lot about strategy and two-letter words. I never got to meet Gramps, who died before I was born, but Gram and her later-life companion, Ernie, played VERY competitive Scrabble every night. In fact, sometimes they went to Elderhostels that were actually Scrabble tournaments! After she died - Ernie had died several years earlier - I inherited their well-worn Scrabble board and dictionary. In the Scrabble dictionary was a letter from Ernie that began "My Love" and proceeded to describe one of the tournaments in detail. It's simultaneously hilarious, adorable, and poignant - I still look at it sometimes.

Gram's favorite game - here are some of her most-used words.

One thing I loved about Gram (and admittedly resented sometimes) was her love of winning, and she wasn't about to let her granddaughter off the hook when playing Scrabble together. I vividly remember the only time I ever beat her - we were sitting at her dining room table, eating her favorite Trader Joe's blue corn chips and silently surveying the board. When I realized I was about to win, I got a little nervous that she was going to be mad. Well......... she might not have been mad per se, but we did have a pretty quiet evening after that!

I mentioned my idea of using French beaded flowers to incorporate my mom's mom's memory (Grandma) into the wedding; Grandpa (94 and still working 2 days a week) also recently gave me Grandma's beautiful ring to use as my wedding band. But I was struggling with a creative idea for Gram - I have her beautiful star opal/yellow gold engagement ring, but I already wear that a lot. Then I was reading this post from Offbeat Bride, and I thought, "Of course! I've seen these all over Etsy!"

sources: pendant 1, pendant 2

These charms are made from Scrabble tiles, and most sellers will work with you to incorporate your own picture. The photo side of the charm is covered with a sturdy, shiny resin. I think I'd like at least one of them - maybe a picture of Gram & Gramps, or separate pictures - to hang from my bouquet. I hope I can request specific letters so I can get her initials!

bouquet charm source

I know that some details like this will go unnoticed by most people, and that's why I love it: having that little secret makes me feel like my grandparents are there for me on our wedding day. Gram would have loved Tim, and it's always made me sad that they were never able to meet. This is a way for her to be there with the two of us... without Tim having to play Scrabble, which he hates. :-)

What creative and meaningful ways have you chosen to incorporate absent family & friends?

Looking for a sign

2008-06-24T09:54:00.000-04:00

Our venue is way off the beaten path. Since most guests are coming from out of town (and many of the in-town guests haven't been there), some will be coming in shuttles and others will be driving rental cars. Getting there is fairly straightforward, but it's always good to have a little reinforcement. And the last time I drove out there, I discovered that I didn't get cell phone service for the last mile of the drive from Ithaca. Hmm...

So I'd like to greet our guests with rustic wood signs, kind of like these from the now-Mrs. Penguin of Weddingbee:

Should ours say Cathy + Mark, too?

I'm also interested in finding some vintage or vintage-looking "farmers' market" signs to put around the buffet tables and make our theme a little clearer:

source - looky what came up when I googled "farmers' market sign!"

Here's the problem: I'm totally fighting myself over the cuteness of the theme and Tim's and my aversion to all things cutesy. All right, that's a blatant lie. But I want our wedding to be special and sweet and unique, not cute.

This is SO up Tim's alley! (It might even be a little much for me...)

So I think I'll try my hand at some of the name/direction signs. What do you think about having one that says "T & W's farmers' market" or "T & W's market" near the food? Overboard? Help!

And while I'm here... how much of your wedding's "aesthetic" is yours, and how much is your S.O's? If s/he doesn't really care about creative input, are you taking tastes into consideration, or are you going with things *you* like?

glug glug glug

2008-06-24T08:35:00.001-04:00

source

A few weeks ago, when I was visiting my parents in Milwaukee, I was awakened by a crazy Midwestern thunderstorm that was so loud I couldn't fall back asleep. So I did what any normal woman would do at 7:17 a.m. in her pajamas. I went shopping!

I checked out the online registry for Gillian and Mike, high school friends who were getting married that weekend (hence the Milwaukee trip), and bought two things from their Williams-Sonoma registry. They live in Brooklyn and don't have a huge kitchen, and I know they're worried they won't be able to fit their gifts in the house. Since I was late in getting to the registry, though, I wasn't left with a lot of options. I have a feeling my bundt pan and pastry decorating set might not get much use for a few years yet.

source

The other gift I bought is for Meg and Dan, who got married in May. Of.... um.... 2007. Oops. Tim and I couldn't go to their wedding because we had a concert in Rome the same weekend, and I was really bummed. I mean, obviously I was beyond thrilled to get a paid trip to Rome with my man, but I was honestly torn when I found out it was the same weekend as the wedding. I've been friends with them since college and also went to grad school with them, and they're really some of my favorite people. They were also around when Tim and I first started dating, and they put up with my whining about this annoying guy who kept taking the train to Boston just to see me. And they put up with me when I admitted I actually liked him.

For over a year I had been guiltily reminding myself that I owed them a wedding present. They are some of the most generous friends around, and I feel like such a tool that I kept putting it off... but the year was really tough with the move and so much traveling, and whenever I had a spare bit of money, it disappeared all too quickly. But living with my parents for a week left me with a little leftover cash, and Meg & Dan's present immediately came to mind.

They actually didn't register for gifts, opting to ask for donations to several charitable causes. I made a small donation in their honor but still wanted to get them something tangible, and I found the *perfect* thing (which I unfortunately couldn't help telling them about EIGHT MONTHS AGO): the gurgle pot!

Make sure your sound is on when you click this! source

Oh yes indeed, I'll admit it: this is one of those gifts I would love for myself. In a similar vein, Tim and I gave our friends Brian and Molly a gift certificate to Blik for their wedding this past winter.

One of Blik's freakin' awesome designs. Oh Blik, how I yearn to affix you to my paper-white walls...

Yup, we're that "quirky, artsy" couple who likes to stray from the registry. I'm convinced that Blik is one of the awesomest things ever and would TOTALLY buy some for our house if I had 60 extra bucks. The gurgle pot, though, strikes me as a true necessity. It's random enough that hipsters would love it, but it's also similar enough to this that even a Boston society girl might display it in her china cabinet.

What do you think? Do you strictly purchase gifts from friends' registries, or do you buy something more unique if you know the couple better?

Not a ringing endorsement.

2008-06-24T08:05:00.000-04:00

The other day we took a trip to the Big Mall because Tim's hard drive conked out. Luckily, he had everything except iTunes backed up, but it still meant 2+ hours of driving and a sorely tempting trip to the mall for a shallow-pocketed shopaholic (that would be me).

Of course, I'm remarkably good at finding things to do in a mall even when I don't have money to spend. Some people call this window shopping - I prefer "simulated buying" (like filling up online "shopping carts" and closing Safari before I get my wallet out).

That's not me, though I know the exposed midriff had you confused. source

While we waited for his computer, I had the brilliant idea of stopping by a jeweler to check his ring size and suss out what a good width might be. Since my ring is handmade and pretty unique, I'd like to find something for Tim that's equally offbeat (Etsy to the rescue, yet again!), and we're not likely to find that at this mall. Still, since there's no shortage of jewelers at the Carousel Center, I figured we should just find one that didn't look too busy and have him try on a few rings.

We went into a chain jewelry store that didn't have any customers at the moment, and I told the woman outright that we were having a ring custom-made and that he just wanted to try on a few for reference. I realize this might seem really obnoxious, but she wasn't busy (it was a weekday afternoon), and if it were me, I'd rather know from the get-go that the customer wasn't planning to buy. Tim put on about 8 different rings and had the same range of responses to the widths of all of them: "........................." or [shrug] or :::sideways glance at me:::. Not exactly helpful. I kept prodding, saying things like, "Well, you could get

that width but not as bulky," and "Which fit feels the best?" just trying to gauge *any* kind of reaction. Nothing. And he and I could both see the saleswoman's annoyance that she wasn't going to make a sale.

source

Tim has never worn a ring before, and he's concerned about it fitting badly and feeling weird and/or too heavy. The tricky part is that he wants it to look very irregular and handmade, so it might be hard to find something comfortable that has those characteristics. The rings he likes look like these, but in matte yellow gold and [I would imagine] about 5-6 mm wide:

sources: ring 1, ring 2

I think it would be good to ask the designer (we're honing in on one - more soon) to make the ring as thin as possible, with the inside being polished smooth and the outside texture taking care of making it look "substantial." The woman at the jewelry store warned that anything besides a comfort-fit band would create a callous, which freaked Tim out. Hmm. Now, I have a very, very faint callous from the irregular silver ring I wore for 10 years, and my engagement ring (definitely not comfort fit!) hasn't caused any problems so far. He'll probably have to take his ring off when he plays most of his instruments, anyway, so although it should be comfortable enough to play once in awhile, that's likely not too much of an issue. (N.B.: This resulted in a Wendy-instigated bickering session about how I think he'll leave it in his jeans pocket and put it through the wash.)

Do you have other ideas of how we can find Tim the perfect (not-too-expensive) ring that will satisfy all our criteria?

(bride.)

go on over!

*slinking back...*

wedding recap #1: pre-ceremony

New family member!!!

leave me unprotected, please.

first teaser (b&w)

that's it!

wedding week quickie #2

quickie

mallblograt (warning: vent. with no pictures. read at your own risk.)

Craftiness

Beribboned

Bridesmaid swag

Hello!

This flat-out sucks.

GO BREWERS!!!!!

Confession

No Zzzzz

NWR - in memoriam.

One more thing about the cake...

Timmy's first DIY!*

The flower chick

Centerpeace.

remember me?

Satin and bows and droooooool

Oh my Gocco, part infinity and beyond!!!

Oh my Gocco!

Non-wedding related: finding humor in the face of unfunniness.

Well, aren't I forgetful?!

stupid tie-tle

p.s.

Here we go!

MIA

LEDisaster

More paper love, and a few more Etsy goodies.

First - and most gorgeous - things first.

absent, but not forever...

To open, or not to open?

July showers!

.... and breaking with it.

Tradition......

Eeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!

Say bye-bye to wetness!

Veggie patch

My tomatoes are GROWING!

Guilty guilted me into it.

I just watched a very long All-Star game...

Westward, ho! (Hey, don't call me that.)

Again with the late night posts...

The favor of your favor, part 2

The favor of your favor

Raw goodness

Todayyyyyy is for Aaaaaa-myyyyyyy***

Back tonight...

Pho, Licks, and Salon Gabby

We interrupt this program

Independence

Picture-less post

Auspicious giglet

To quote Tessie...

Inside the box

Beet it

Is it because I ate too close to bedtime?

Cake quandary

Grandparentage

Looking for a sign

glug glug glug

Not a ringing endorsement.

slinking back...